Insanity
by Shadows in the Light of Day
Summary: Reconciled to the belief that Lithuania and Latvia do not care about him, Estonia makes a desperate plan that he believes will save them all, but may in fact destroy him once and for all. As Lithuania struggles to make sense of Estonia's behavior, he is confronted by a nation who is only just realizing what has been happening to the Baltics for years. Sequel to Latvia's Absence.
1. Chapter 1

**Hola, amigos! And amigas...I think most of you are amigas. Anyways, enough Spanish practice. I'm BAAAACCCCCKKKK! Yeah, you knew that. Enough randomness. **

**Well, here's the semi-promised sequel to "Latvia's Absence". Considering it's called "Insanity", I think you can probably figure out where this is going. But I'll say nothing more about that. **

**Random thing: If Estonia's scene doesn't make sense...it's not supposed to. **

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><p>Chapter One:<p>

_"I know they don't care about me."_

The thought kept running through Estonia's mind, and no matter how hard he tried to distract himself, to banish the thought, those words wouldn't stop haunting him.

_"When you leave-and you all will leave me someday, because everyone leaves me-they won't want you with them. Lithuania always goes out of his way for Latvia, so maybe he will take him along wherever he goes. But you? You are just the third wheel, useless Estonia. Smart, but not so very useful to them in the long run. They will leave you behind."_

The things Russia had told him, just before…

He cut the thought off, not wanting to remember what had happened that night. It had been a week since Latvia had returned safely from his imprisonment in the attic. Three weeks since that long, painful night when Estonia had realized that his only friends didn't care about him, or want him, or need him. And a week since he had decided it didn't matter if they cared or not.

And they didn't care. He was sure of that now. The facts were etched into his mind, along with Latvia's solemn, frightened, sorrowful face, along with echoing footsteps that faded into nothing as Latvia ran back, back to the place he had been ordered to stay, back to comparative safety, abandoning Estonia, leaving him alone…

At that time, Estonia's greatest fear was being alone, because after the dark, painful, lonely days and nights he had spent locked in Russia's basement, he was afraid to ever be alone again. Alone, the darkness was terrifying. Alone, the darkness told him things that weren't true…or, at least, he had denied the truth of the dark's malicious whispers, and it was so hard to block the voices out…

But he was done with that fear, now.

It didn't matter anymore, because if he was always going to be alone, he might as well get over the fear before it became irreversible. And he would always be alone. Lithuania and Latvia didn't seem to want him around, not when they had each other. He would always be the third wheel-or the sixth wheel, or whatever else he might be. He would always be alone, there but not wanted. The voices in the dark had told him the truth.

So, if his fate did not matter, there was nothing to stop him from doing anything necessary to protect the others. If they didn't care what happened to him, then if he was hurt, it wouldn't hurt them.

And he didn't want them to be hurt. Even if the other Baltics had never cared about him, Estonia cared about them. He would protect them, whether or not they cared about him, whether or not they thought they needed him. Estonia was tired of hiding, and even more tired of letting Lithuania protect him. He was going to go through with his plan, whether or not Lithuania approved.

And Lithuania most definitely would not approve of what Estonia was going to do. No, if Lithuania found out what he was planning, Estonia knew that the other nation would be absolutely appalled.

But he would do it anyways.

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><p>Lithuania's day started out in a perfectly normal way…but most of his worst days were the ones that started out nicely. On the days that didn't start out nicely, he was usually unconscious, or, worse yet, awake and trying not to let anyone know how hurt he was.<p>

He was alone in the kitchen, cooking breakfast, when he first realized that this would not be a normal day. It was early, and he was fairly certain that he was the only person up. All was peaceful.

And then, suddenly, the peace evaporated. The kitchen door flew open, and a very irate-looking person stormed in. It was Belarus, who did not look pleased at all.

"Um… H-hello, Belarus," Lithuania stammered, rather terrified and very confused by the other nation's unexpected entrance, "I-is there anything I can h-help you with?"

Ordinarily, he wouldn't have been this afraid of Belarus, but there was something very threatening about her demeanor this morning.

"Yes, there is," said Belarus, and Lithuania began to wonder what he had done to incur the girl's displeasure. However, Belarus's next words were nothing that he would have expected. They were far worse.

"I want you to tell me what has been going on," Belarus said, glaring at Lithuania in a way that seemed to imply that she would murder him if he did not answer her questions, "Most specifically, I want to know what happened on the night that I found you locked into your room, and you rushed off without explaining the situation. You will explain that situation. Now."

Lithuania froze. This was definitely _not_ something he wanted to discuss. To make matters worse, he wasn't _allowed_ to discuss it, especially not with Belarus. It was absolutely forbidden for the Baltics to even mention Russia's mistreatment of them around his sisters. That would result in further and even more brutal punishment, and none of them wanted to pay that price.

And, even if he had been allowed to tell Belarus about it, Lithuania didn't want to. He never wanted to revisit his memories of the night Latvia had gone missing, the night Estonia had stormed off to confront Russia. The night that had been the first time Lithuania ever remembered having seen Estonia break down and cry.

No, he most definitely did not want to think about that night. But now it looked as if he would have no choice but to tell Belarus everything.

However, when he was on the brink of telling her, of letting the secrets and all the bad things that came with them out into the light, he was stopped by a deceptively innocent voice from just outside.

"Belarus? Little sister, are you down here so early?"

Both Lithuania and Belarus instantly went into action; Lithuania darting back to the stove, Belarus turning toward the door. But just as Belarus reached the doorway, she turned back for an instant, and whispered:

"Sometime later today, I will come to your room, and you _will_ tell me what's going on!"

And before Lithuania had a chance to argue, Belarus was gone.

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><p><strong>And that, ladies and gentlemen, is the first chapter of "Insanity"! *resists urge to sing Vocaloid song* <strong>

**Chapters should be up fairly quickly, but, as usual, I'm not going to stress about it. Reviews will most likely inspire me to write quickly. ;) **

**One last thing. Belarus is really CONFUSING to write about. Taking her seriously is...hard. *dies* What have I gotten myself into...? **


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello, humans (and aliens, and whatever else you may be)! I'm back, with chapter two of "Insanity". **

**I should tell you something you don't know. Um... I've got nothing. **

**Any-who, I hope you enjoy the story!**

**Oh, almost forgot! I should now answer guest reviews! **

**Guest (first guest that reviewed): Thanks for the review! I'm glad you like the story! :D**

**Guest: (second guest that reviewed): Thanks for the review! :D Yup...I'd say Russia's succeeded in breaking Estonia, but not quite in the way he intended to... Heh, I hope Belarus won't kill Lithuania, but, you're right, I could see her doing it...**

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><p>Chapter Two:<p>

Lithuania couldn't remember a day ever having passed so slowly as this one. All through the day, he was preoccupied, trying to figure out what he could possibly say to Belarus. But even in his preoccupied state, he was still doing his job as best he could. This was _not_ the day to go around breaking things, not if he wanted to still be able to do anything properly tomorrow. And with Belarus already asking awkward questions, it would be difficult to explain away any injuries.

In one respect, however, luck was on his side, in the form of oblivious friends. Neither Latvia nor Estonia seemed to notice his preoccupation.

Latvia had been strangely quiet in the days since he had returned from his confinement in Russia's attic, and although Lithuania had asked him about it on several occasions, the smaller nation had evaded his questions, and Lithuania had eventually given up on asking him. However, one upside to Latvia's silence was that he seemed to be getting more careful about what he did. There had been no broken dishes-or broken anything-since the youngest Baltic had returned.

Estonia also seemed preoccupied, and that _did_ worry Lithuania. He couldn't seem to shake a feeling that the blonde Baltic was planning something, and although he didn't know what, it made him feel distinctly on edge. Estonia had never acted this way before, so quiet and thoughtful all the time. And when he did speak, it always seemed as if his mind was elsewhere.

But now it was nighttime, and Lithuania was alone, waiting for Belarus's inevitable visit. He had decided that he would avoid telling the other nation the truth if he could, but that he would not go to huge risks to keep her from finding out what had happened. She has probably already guessed at the truth, and if he didn't tell her, she would probably only force one of the others to.

There was a knock on his door, and with a sigh, Lithuania went over to open it. This was going to be a long night.

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><p>Estonia was ready. The plan had been forming in his mind since before Latvia had come back, but it had gone from a fantasy to a hoped-for reality after the youngest Baltic had returned.<p>

It had taken a great deal of caution and even more planning just to get the tools necessary for what he was planning to do. It had also involved practically blackmailing someone he did not want to blackmail-namely, Ukraine-but Estonia had finally gotten his hands on the thing he needed most in order to execute his plan successfully.

_"After all,"_ Estonia thought, tracing his finger idly along the surface of the gun he had stolen from Russia's not-so-secret hiding place, _"You can't go after one of the most dangerous nations on earth without a proper weapon."_

He knew he had to act quickly, though. It had been two days since he had made Ukraine tell him where Russia kept the guns. The other nation would be recovering her nerve now, forgetting the threats Estonia had made. And, really, it wouldn't be that difficult for someone to figure out who he was going to use the gun on-even someone as nice as Ukraine, who only knew where the guns were because Russia had told her so she could protect herself if something ever happened to the others.

And if Ukraine told Russia, or Belarus, or even one of the other Baltics… If she told them what he was planning, then Estonia's fate would likely be worse than death itself.

_"So," _Estonia thought, smiling as he looked down at the gun he held in his hands, _"Tonight, everything changes."_

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><p>When Lithuania opened the door, he found Belarus standing outside, looking surprisingly nervous.<p>

"Shut the door!" the girl hissed, darting past him, "Ukraine will come looking for me, but she won't check here if the door's closed!"

"Why will she be looking for you?" Lithuania asked, confused.

"She saw me leaving my room and wanted to know where I was going," Belarus muttered, "She looked worried about something, but she said it could wait when I asked her what was wrong, so it must not be very important."

Lithuania tried to figure out what could have worried Ukraine, but his thought trail was quickly cut off when he noticed Belarus staring at him expectantly.

"Well?" the girl said impatiently, "Are you going to tell me what's going on or not?"

"B-Belarus…" Lithuania stammered, "I c-can't…you have n-no idea what he'll d-do to me if I t-tell you…"

"He?" Belarus asked, her voice quiet, "My brother?"

Lithuania fell silent.

"Tell me," Belarus said softly, "I won't hurt you."

Considering that this was the woman who had been responsible for a substantial portion of the broken bones he had ended up with in his lifetime, Lithuania had his doubts about her not hurting him, but he didn't dare say that. The brunet Baltic sighed, and, almost without realizing it, he sank down on the bed and buried his face in his hands.

"He'll _kill_ me if I tell you…" he whispered, without even realizing it.

Suddenly, his hands were wrenched away from his face. Before Lithuania could react, he felt something strike him. Surprised, he looked up and saw Belarus glaring down at him.

"Get it together, right now!" Belarus hissed, "Russia will not hurt you, because he will not know that you told me anything. I know how to lie too, Lithuania. If he found out, then I would tell him that I crept up to his room one night and heard him torturing you. He does torture you, doesn't he? I've been watching since that night, and I think that's what's happening, but I need to know the truth. I want to know what is going on, and you will tell me, or I will hurt you. And you know I mean what I say."

Lithuania did know, but he still didn't want to tell her. He had kept the secret for so long that it seemed insane to just blurt it out-and to Belarus of all people! That was even more ludicrous than the confession itself.

But there was no way to get around it. So, he took a deep breath, and tried to calm himself as best he could.

"A-all right," he said shakily, "I'll t-try to tell you."

"Good boy," said Belarus, and Lithuania began to wonder if he had morphed into a puppy without realizing it.

"Now," Belarus said, sitting down on the opposite end of the bed, "Speak."

And he did. It started with halting, stammering sentences, but as he talked, he found that it became easier to tell, although he still found his voice breaking several times. Belarus was silent as he recounted everything. The beatings, whippings, the more ingenious tortures that Russia thought up…everything came out at once.

And when there was nothing left to tell, when silence reigned again supreme, Lithuania looked up, and saw Belarus staring at him.

"Is this true?" the girl demanded, her voice growing louder with every word, "Is it?"

"I… Yes," Lithuania whispered, looking away. "You p-probably don't believe me, but it is all t-true. Everything I told you…happened."

"I…did not know…" Belarus said slowly, "I did not know he did that to you. He had told me that he punished you, but I had assumed it was in the manner that the mothers punish their little children. Not…not like _that_…"

"It's all right," Lithuania said, "I'm used to it… We're all used to it…"

It was an outrageous lie, because you never really did get used to it, no matter how hard you tried. He had told Estonia once that you could distract yourself, and it would help the pain a little. But you couldn't stay distracted forever, and, eventually, the pain would come back to haunt you.

"Lies," Belarus said, and Lithuania decided that on top of everything else, the girl was a mind reader, "You don't get used to torture. You withstand it, or it breaks you. And I am not so sure whether you are broken or not. You confused me before, and now I think you are a complete puzzle, the kind that geniuses like to solve."

"Excuse me?" Lithuania said. He had never thought of himself as a very complex person, and he wanted to know what made Belarus think there anything puzzling about him.

"If what you say is true, then you should never be able to smile the way you do," Belarus said, "You should be incapable of feeling, but you aren't. That confuses me."

"Having a semi-cheerful attitude confuses you…?" Lithuania mumbled, "I don't understand."

"If Russia wanted to break you," Belarus said, "Then he would have tried his hardest to do so. You shouldn't be capable of smiling anymore, but you smile anyways."

Lithuania said nothing. He had no idea how to reply to Belarus.

"I am not sure that I believe you," Belarus said, "I am not sure that I believe what you told me about my brother. I will have to think about this."

The girl stood up, but then she turned back to face Lithuania, and the brunet Baltic thought that he saw a faint gleam of some emotion in her eyes.

"Don't be afraid," she said, "Whether this is true or not, I won't tell my brother. He wouldn't like to hear that I was hanging about with…"

"Servants," Lithuania said quietly, "It doesn't offend me to be called what I am, Belarus. I know my place. Russia doesn't let me forget."

There was silence for a moment, as both Lithuania and Belarus tried to collect their thoughts. And it was in the midst of that silence that a gunshot echoed through the house.

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><p><strong>Well...that's that, I suppose. I've already written chapter three, and part of chapter four, so the next chapter will probably be up on...Friday? Yeah, Friday. I'll try to update every two days until I run out of chapters, and then update whenever I finish one. :)<strong>

**Please review, it makes Shadow feel that she is actually writing something that isn't worthless. ;) **


	3. Chapter 3

**Hello, awesome people! Well, as you can see, today is Friday! Well...at least, it's Friday where I live. It might be Thursday or Saturday where you live. Okay, I will stop over analyzing things now. **

**I'll just answer the guest review, and we shall get on with the chapter! :)**

**Guest: Thanks for the review! I laughed a lot reading it... **

**Yes, Estonia is Kira! Now you've made me want to write a Death Note crossover... XD**

**So, apparently, Lithuania is a dog now. O_O I must draw this! **

**Hmm...will she? I guess you'll have to wait and see... **

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><p>Chapter Three:<p>

Estonia had never felt more sure that what he was about to do was right. Ordinarily, that would have scared him a little. But, for some reason, all his fear had evaporated into nothingness. And in place of his fear were those strange little voices, whispering to him, telling him it would be okay.

_"If you do this, Lithuania and Latvia won't understand why. But then, in time, they will realize why you did it, that you were trying to help, and they'll thank you for it. You'll see. It'll be all right."_

And he almost believed it would be all right. In fact, the more he thought about it, the more he wondered why he hadn't thought of this alternative sooner. Everything else that the Baltics had tried had gone horribly wrong, and ended in violence… But if they started with the most violence possible, then how could the ending be any worse than the beginning?

The blonde Baltic gripped the gun tightly as he marched up the stairs to Russia's room. It wouldn't do to lose the gun, would it?

Estonia smiled to himself as he paused for a moment outside of Russia's room.

_"So,"_ he thought, _"This is the end…of everything."_

He didn't know where the thought had come from, but it seemed to fit the situation, and he rather liked it. He stood there for a moment longer, smiling for no particular reason. And then, tightening his grip on the gun, he reached for the doorknob.

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><p>"What was that?" Belarus asked.<p>

Lithuania did not reply. He was starting to feel very, very afraid. He could think of only a few reasons that Russia would have fired a gun at anyone…and almost all of those reasons had something to do with Estonia or Latvia.

"I…don't know," he said quietly, trying to suppress his sense of dread.

"We need to see what it is," Belarus said, as if the gunshot had just been a noise of something breaking, and not the sound of a potentially lethal weapon going off. "Come."

Not daring to disagree, Lithuania followed Belarus out into the hallway, where they stood still for a moment, trying to figure out where the shot had come from. It was then that Lithuania first heard footsteps from down the hall.

"B-Belarus," he whispered, "There's somebody…"

"Big sister," Belarus said, and Lithuania realized that the girl had already noticed the footsteps.

It was indeed Ukraine, who came running up to them, looking extremely distraught.

"What is wrong?" Belarus asked. Ukraine did not reply, and Lithuania suddenly realized that the older girl was crying.

"Ukraine!" Belarus snapped, grabbing the other girl's shoulders and shaking her, "Stop, now! Tell us what is wrong, or we can't help you!"

"Estonia's crazy!" Ukraine sobbed, "H-he…he made me show him where Russia keeps the guns… And then he took one!"

Lithuania felt as if everything had stopped, as if he was the only thing still moving.

_"No, please… Tell me this isn't happening… Estonia…"_

"When did this occur?" Belarus asked, somehow remaining calm despite the circumstances.

"T-two nights ago," Ukraine wailed, "I was going to tell Russia, but Estonia was scaring me and I couldn't figure out why he was scaring me and I didn't think he was seriously going to…"

"And he has done it…" Lithuania murmured, "He's actually gone to challenge Russia once and for all."

And, he suddenly realized, that would do no good. Even if Estonia succeeded in his crazed mission, even if the Baltics left Russia's house, the other nation would only find them again and drag them back. And Lithuania couldn't even think about what Estonia's punishment would be for doing such a deed.

"I have to stop him," he whispered, and suddenly both Belarus and Ukraine were staring at him.

"He's got to be stopped before someone gets hurt!" Lithuania said urgently, "Go back to your rooms, both of you, and don't come out until I tell you it's safe. And _don't_ let Estonia in if he somehow manages to get down there, understood?"

Ukraine nodded, and Lithuania could see the fear in her eyes. Belarus, however, looked skeptical.

"How do we know you didn't help Estonia plan this?"

Lithuania could easily have started crying at that precise moment, he was so disturbed and frustrated.

"You're just going to have to trust me," he said, staring pleadingly at Belarus, "Please. Just this once, do what I say."

There was silence for several moments. Then, Belarus nodded.

"Then take this," she said, and, reaching into her pocket, she pulled out a long knife.

Lithuania stared at the knife, not wanting to take it.

"You need it," Belarus insisted, thrusting the knife at him, "If you told me the truth about big brother, and if Ukraine is telling the truth about Estonia, then you have two mentally unstable people to deal with, and one of them has a gun. Take the knife. Now!"

Lithuania had no choice but to accept the knife. Somewhere in his mind, he knew Belarus was right. If he was going to do this incredibly risky and foolish thing, then he would need some sort of weapon.

"T-thank you," he whispered, accepting the knife.

Belarus nodded, and then, as she turned back to Ukraine, she muttered:

"Good luck. You'll need it."

And Lithuania was sure that that was the nicest thing Belarus had ever said to him. But he had no time to dwell on that. Because, as he heard a second gunshot echo through the long halls of Russia's mansion, he began to get a terrible feeling that time was running out.

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><p>Russia had not been expecting anything to happen on this particular night. Then again, the Baltics tended to defy predictability. But <em>no one<em> ever stormed into his room in the middle of the night…

Except Estonia. Estonia seemed to have formed a habit of invading rooms where he had no business. And now the blonde Baltic was back, which confused Russia. He didn't remember doing anything in recent days that would have provoked a visit from Estonia…

"Estonia?" the tall nation asked, standing up to face the middle Baltic, "What are you wanting?"

"What do I want?" Estonia echoed, and Russia suddenly began to wonder if this was really Estonia. There was something different about the blonde Baltic tonight… There was something in his voice, in his eyes, in his demeanor…something that hadn't been there before.

"I'll tell you what I want," Estonia said, "I want to kill you."

"Oh," said Russia after a moment's pause. He laughed, but it was a laugh with a touch of nervousness in it.

"That is pretty funny joke, Estonia," Russia said, smiling, "Now, what are you_ really_ wanting?"

"First, I want you to stop underestimating me!" Estonia shouted, and Russia suddenly realized that the blonde Baltic had been keeping his right hand carefully concealed. Now, Estonia whipped his hand out from behind his back, revealing something that glinted in the dim light. A gun.

_"Where was he getting _that_?" _Russia thought. He was starting to wonder if this was a bad dream.

"I made Ukraine tell me where you keep your weapons," Estonia said, smiling, "You really shouldn't tell her those things. She's far too easy to scare."

"What did you do to my sister?" Russia snapped, suddenly angrier than he was afraid.

"I could have done a lot of things to her," Estonia said, "Maybe I _should_ have done something. Then you could see how I feel, watching you hurt Lithuania and Latvia."

"If you ever touch my sister, I'll punish you very badly," Russia threatened, although it wasn't a very convincing threat, considering that he was currently being held more or less at gunpoint by an angry Estonia.

"Oh, you won't punish me," Estonia said with a decidedly crazed giggle, "Actually, Russia, I'm going to punish you."

"I do not think you are understanding," Russia said, "You are not in the position for punishing me."

"But, Russia," Estonia said, smiling, "Which one of us has the gun?"

"You are having gun," Russia said, "But if you would be putting it down, then we could be…"

"Shut up!" Estonia yelled. And then, to Russia's shock, the gun went off.

The bullet went wide, hitting the wall near where Russia was standing. The tall nation flinched. Suddenly, this didn't seem like a dream anymore.

"Estonia, this is not being much fun!" Russia said, backing away slightly.

Estonia's smile looked more like a smirk now, and that frightened Russia. There was something not right about this whole situation.

"It's not very fun, is it, Russia?" the Baltic nation asked, "It's not very fun being threatened. Now you know how I felt, all those times when you hurt me. But you're never going to hurt me or Lithuania or Latvia again. I promise you that."

"I…I am not understanding…" Russia mumbled. Actually, he thought he knew what Estonia was going to do, but that was just disturbing.

_"This is bad dream… Must be waking up now… Why am I not waking? I can always be waking when I want to… Unless… No, is bad dream, only a dream!"_

"Oh, you'll understand fairly quickly," Estonia said with a laugh. A moment later, there was a loud noise, but Russia barely had time to register the noise before he felt an unexpected pain in his shoulder. His other hand went to his shoulder, and he soon realized what had happened.

_"Shot… Shot is bad. I want to wake up now!"_

"Estonia… Why?" he asked, his voice sounding plaintive even to himself.

"Why?" Estonia asked, suddenly enraged, "Think of everything you've done to me, and to the others, and tell me you don't know why!"

"I…was trying to be…" Russia stammered, confused. This couldn't be happening. This wasn't happening. It was just a dream… Wasn't it?

He looked around, and located his faucet pipe lying several feet away. Cautiously, Russia moved in the direction of his pipe.

"Stop right there!" Estonia shouted, his gun pointed at Russia's head.

And that was when Russia realized that if this was a bad dream, it was the worst one of his life.

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><p><strong>And that, my friends, is a chapter. I feel like I'm really bad at writing Russia... And snapped!Estonia for that matter... One would think with my obsession with insane characters, I would learn how to write them...<strong>

**Anyways, enough about me and my doubts about my ability to write these characters. **

**I just realized earlier that Latvia has not done a single thing in this entire fanfic. I'm going to remedy that soon, but it probably won't be for a few more chapters. But, this time, unlike in my other fics, Latvia is going to do something! It just requires... No, wait, I can't tell you. Nevermind. You'll see soon.**

**Next update will probably be on Monday, unless I can sneak online on Sunday somehow. Reviews may convince me to update Saturday night! ;) **


	4. Chapter 4

**And...I am back, having dodged the no-internet-on-Sunday rule! XD **

**This chapter will be a little...different. And by different I mean that certain characters may seem out of character (and it will not be due to insanity in one case). I will explain this person's actions at the end of the chapter.**

**Answering guest review now...**

**Guest: Thanks for the review! Nope, you are not a terrible person for thinking that Russia deserves this. He rather _does_ deserve it...**

**I am almost considering writing that now, simply because I want to see Estonia as Light. (I had always thought of doing one with England in Light's role, but Estonia could be fun...)**

**LOL! Yes, Estonia is totally going to become God of the New World! :D I hope not...that could be scary.**

**Oh. My. Gosh! Latvia _does_ remind me of Matsuda... So who would be L, then? XD**

**You're welcome for the chapter! Thank you for the awesome reviews! OK, it's official. My obsession with Death Note is invading my Hetalia fics. I went back and reread that part, and Estonia is _really_ acting like Light. Yeah...I gotta agree with you. With Light, it was rather weird, simply because he had this really sweet family and all these things going for him, and he's still freaking out over all the injustice in the world, where as Estonia...has clearly experienced injustice firsthand. **

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><p>Chapter Four:<p>

Someday, Lithuania was going to get into the habit of making plans before he burst into Russia's bedroom. However, this was not the day for planning. And the moment he entered Russia's room, he was glad that he hadn't stopped to plan.

Russia was backed into the corner of the room, and, not for the first time, Lithuania was struck by how childish the tall nation seemed. And not only did Russia look like a very large child, he also looked confused and frightened.

Estonia's back was to Lithuania, and as the brunet Baltic paused in the doorway, Estonia spoke. Lithuania could barely recognize his voice. It was cold, foreign…like nothing he had ever heard. He remembered Estonia's voice after they had…died…in Russia's basement. The blonde Baltic's voice had been devoid of life then, but there had been no anger in it, not then. Now there was anger, and pain, not merely a lack of emotion.

"Now, Russia," Estonia said, "Are you confused? Frightened, maybe? Good! I want you to be frightened."

"Estonia, stop!" Lithuania cried, and suddenly all eyes were on him.

"Lithuania!" Russia mumbled, looking even more confused than before.

"Go back to bed, Lithuania," Estonia said coldly, "I'll handle this."

"Yes, you'll handle it," Lithuania agreed, taking a cautious step toward Estonia, "And how are you going to do that, Estonia?"

"I'm going to kill him!" Estonia announced, gesturing wildly at Russia, who was now occupied trying to get his hands on his faucet pipe, which was halfway across the room.

"And why do you want to kill him?" Lithuania asked.

"Why shouldn't I?" Estonia retorted, his eyes bright with an emotion that Lithuania couldn't quite identify, "You know what he's done to us, Lithuania! We have every right to punish him for what he's done!"

"But, Estonia…" Lithuania said softly, trying to keep his tone as soothing as possible. He was halfway to where Estonia was standing now, and he could now see that the younger nation was shaking slightly.

"Do you really think that punishing Russia will do any good?" he asked, "Look what his punishments did to you, what it did to me and Latvia. Do you want Russia to be hurt like that?"

"He deserves it!" Estonia snapped, "He deserves to _die_ for what he put us through! Don't you want him to pay for what he's done, Lithuania? Don't you _understand_? We can leave, we can be free…"

"Estonia…" Lithuania murmured, "It wouldn't do any good. You can't kill him. He's a nation. He'd come back to life eventually and come after us. I know you have some kind of fantasy in your mind that makes you think that if you kill him, everything will be okay… But it's not true, Estonia… You can't solve your problems by killing. It just doesn't work that way."

He took a few quick steps toward Estonia, and suddenly, he found himself staring at a gun.

"So you're on his side?" Estonia demanded, "You're on his side, aren't you?!"

"No, I'm not," Lithuania said, "I'm not on anyone's side, Estonia. I just don't want anyone to get hurt."

"If you cared about me or Latvia at all, then you'd realize that this is the only way we can ever be normal again," Estonia said, his words quick and full of anger, "But you're taking _his_ side! Out of all the stupid things Russia has told me, one of them was true! You really don't care about me, do you?"

"Estonia!" Lithuania gasped, shocked, "What makes you say that?"

"If you cared, then you'd want to find a way to get out of here, because if we got out of here, then we would be safe!" Estonia said, "But, no, you want to stay with Russia…"

"I _don't_ want to stay with Russia!" Lithuania cried, "I just don't want to see you get hurt again, Estonia! And if you went through with this, you have no way of knowing what Russia would do to you! You think the beatings are bad? He knows far worse things to do, don't you, Mr. Russia?"

Lithuania glanced over at Russia, and saw the larger nation nod quickly, still looking confused.

"See?" he said, "Russia could do things to you that you can't even begin to imagine, but he won't if you'll just put the gun down…"

"No!" Estonia exploded, "I will not put the gun down! I am not a child, and I don't have to do what you say! If you're on Russia's side, then you can share his fate!"

"Estonia…" Lithuania whispered, staring at the other nation in disbelief, "You can't be serious…"

"If you're going to side with him after all he did to us," Estonia shouted, "Then I have no regrets about what I'm going to do! I did all this to protect you, Toris, and you chose to side with the person who has done us more harm than anyone else on earth! I can't believe you would do this, but since you've made that choice, you'll just have to die too!"

Staring into Estonia's eyes, Lithuania saw nothing of the boy he had once known. Estonia was gone, and there was someone else in his place, someone terrifying, someone insane. And that person had to be stopped, before he did any more harm.

"Then, forgive me," he whispered, and lunged forward.

He had never wanted this to happen, never wanted the nightmares he had from time to time to become reality. But reality his nightmares had become, and to protect Latvia, Belarus, Russia, Ukraine, and himself, he would have to do what he had never wanted to do.

Lithuania had kept his right hand concealed, along with the knife he held. And before the surprised Estonia could react, that knife had lashed out and buried itself in his chest.

Shocked, confused blue eyes met tearful green ones, and it was then that Russia made his move, grabbing his faucet pipe and bringing it down on Estonia's head.

"I probably was not needing to do that," Russia said, "But would have been some small time before he passed out, and that would have been much of the badness, da?"

Lithuania was not listening. The brunet Baltic's eyes filled with tears as he stood staring at Estonia's unmoving form.

"Forgive me, Eduard…" he whispered, falling to his knees, "Forgive me…"

* * *

><p>Lithuania didn't know how long he remained there, crying his eyes out next to Estonia's body. But he did notice when someone grabbed his hair and roughly pulled him to his feet.<p>

"You are not needing to remain in this place," Russia said, "Stop this crying, take Estonia back where he belongs, and be locking him up where he cannot be doing any more of the hurting."

Although the last thing Lithuania wanted to do at the moment was stop crying and pull himself together, he realized that Russia had somehow managed to make a sensible request for once. He glanced up at the taller nation, and noticed for the first time that Russia's coat had blood on it.

"He…shot you?" Lithuania whispered.

"Da," Russia said, "He would have shot me more times if you had not come when you did. I…must be thanking you…"

"Thanking me?" Lithuania said bitterly, "Yes, certainly, Mr. Russia. Thank me for stabbing one of my dearest friends, to save you. Maybe…maybe I should have just…let him…"

"What are you saying?" Russia asked.

"This is all your fault!" Lithuania cried, "Don't you realize what you've done?! You've broken Estonia… You've torn him apart, and nothing you can ever do can fix that!"

Lithuania began to cry again, unable to stop himself.

"You destroyed him!" the brunet Baltic sobbed, "He never did anything to you, and you broke him! Couldn't you see it? Couldn't you hear it? Could you see the light in his eyes, hear the insanity in his voice? How is it not obvious to you what you've done? How is it not obvious that it's your fault Estonia has lost his mind?!"

"I…I am not…" Russia said, sounding surprised. The large nation released his grip on Lithuania's hair, and the Baltic nation sank to his knees again, crying uncontrollably.

"You are not _what_?!" Lithuania shrieked, "You are not sorry? You don't understand? Maybe I don't understand either! Maybe I don't understand why you did this to us!"

He stared desperately up at Russia, willing the other nation to understand. But all he saw in Russia's violet eyes was confusion, anger, and pain. Pain, only because he had been shot, not because of what he had done.

"Just be going now," Russia said, his voice tense, "Just be going, and after you have been taking Estonia where he belongs, go and get Ukraine. My shoulder is much of the hurting."

Lithuania didn't have the energy or the willpower to argue, and so he complied with Russia's order. It took a bit of maneuvering to get Estonia downstairs and into his room, but Lithuania finally managed it. He didn't know what had happened to Belarus's knife, but he was pretty sure that it was lying on the floor in Russia's room.

The brunet Baltic wanted to address Estonia's injuries as quickly as possible, but the fact of the matter was that Estonia was temporarily dead, and Russia had been shot in the shoulder. Having two dead-or, at the very least, badly injured-nations to deal with would not be much fun for anyone involved. And he would need to be there when Estonia woke up, not out explaining what had happened to Ukraine and Belarus.

And so, Lithuania found himself outside Ukraine's bedroom, knocking on the door.

"Ms. Ukraine?" he called, "It's me, Lithuania."

The door opened a very small bit, and once the person inside identified Lithuania as himself, it was opened wider.

"Is everything all right now?" Ukraine asked, sounding extremely on edge.

"Russia's been shot," Lithuania said. Ordinarily, he would have felt bad about being so blunt with Ukraine, but he no longer had the energy nor the time to break things to her gently.

Ukraine gasped. Judging by her expression, the blonde girl was absolutely horrified.

"It's not too bad or anything," Lithuania said, "At least, I don't think so. If it was very bad, then he would have sent me to get you directly."

He had no time to explain anything else, as Ukraine had already turned away. Grabbing a few items from inside her room, the other nation brushed past Lithuania and ran upstairs.

Lithuania turned and walked slowly back to the room where he had left Estonia. It was there that he found Belarus.

"What happened?" the girl asked. She was standing in the hallway, staring at Lithuania in evident confusion.

And with those words, everything came rushing back at once, and Lithuania realized that he was a murderer. And then he burst into tears again.

"Stop that," Belarus said, "Stop that at once!"

Lithuania paid no attention to her order, and continued crying. Almost without realizing it, he found himself reaching out for comfort, for friendship, for anything. And the closest thing was Belarus.

He didn't notice it at the time, but later on, he realized how strange it was that Belarus didn't push him off and walk away. But she didn't. She _let_ him cling onto her, let him cry…_held_ him as he cried.

And, still crying, he haltingly explained what had happened. And Belarus still didn't shy away from him, although she had every right to.

"Tears will do no good," the girl said, "What you have done, that you did to protect us all. Murder is when you kill, not in self defense, but out of a malicious intent. You killed to defend us. Latvia, Russia, Ukraine, and myself… You defended us. That is an act of…of courage. I never thought I would say this about you, Lithuania…but you are brave."

"N-no, I'm not!" Lithuania sobbed, "I'm j-just an idiot! If I had r-realized what Estonia was doing, m-maybe I c-could…"

"He had lost his mind!" Belarus snapped, "There would have been no reasoning with him! Your pathetic crying will get you nowhere! What you must do is attend to Estonia, and hope that his mind heals with his body! Tears will not accomplish this!"

"How would you know?" Lithuania sobbed, "How do you know that?"

"There is actually more to me than my obsession over Russia and my annoyance with you," Belarus said, "Although I am currently extremely annoyed with you, but that is not the point. Pull yourself together, for Estonia's sake if no one else's! If you have died before-and if your stories are true, then you have-then you know the pain he will experience until he awakes! Spare him as much of that pain as you possibly can, and get to work now!"

Lithuania pulled away slightly, staring at Belarus.

"There really is a lot more to you than your obsession with Russia," he murmured, and then turned away.

* * *

><p><strong>And that...was a very, very weird chapter to write. OK, I will attempt to explain what I view as a slightly OOC Lithuania in this chapter.<strong>

**Lithuania did _not_ want to stab Estonia. If he could have avoided it, he would have. If it had been only himself at risk, then he would have let Estonia shoot him rather than hurt his friend. However, it _wasn't_ just his life at risk. It was also the lives of four other people, and there was a chance that Estonia would have shot Belarus and Ukraine, as well as Russia. Therefore, the only reason he stabbed Estonia was to protect the others. It was the last thing he wanted to do.**

**As for Belarus's behavior, infer what you want about that. I have no idea what she's doing anymore.**

**Reviews make Shadow write quickly, and will help me keep updating every two days! ;) (Because I am seriously distracted right now. Have you guys seen Ouran High School Host Club? I'm obsessed right now. It's freaking hilarious. And weird. But I like weird.)**


	5. Chapter 5

**Well...I know I'm a day late. My sincerest apologies! One thing led to another, and I just didn't get to updating yesterday. But the chapter is here now! Next update will probably be on Friday, or thereabouts.**

**Now, to answer the guest review! (Saltpath, I sent you a PM on your account in the form of a reply to your review, so I DID reply. :) )**

**Guest: Well, there's definitely SOMETHING up with him, that's for sure! XD**

**Yeah...I'm honestly not completely sure how it happened, but that chapter ended up being the REALLY surprising one. That's the thing now, isn't it. Sane or insane... **

**Ouran is absolutely hilarious! :D And everything else you said as well. **

**You're welcome, and thank you for reviewing! **

* * *

><p>Chapter Five:<p>

To Lithuania's surprise, Belarus helped him fix Estonia up. The girl was not particularly adept when it came to the care of injuries, but she did manage to get Lithuania the things he needed, and watched his every move carefully.

"Sometime," Belarus had said, "I might need to know these things."

After they had finished patching Estonia up, Belarus finally pointed out that Lithuania had blood on his shirt.

"It…it must have spattered on me when I…when I stabbed Estonia…" Lithuania murmured, "And it won't wash out particularly easily."

"Go get some more clothes," Belarus said, "It is not hard."

"I…I don't have any more," Lithuania said, blushing despite the rather traumatic circumstances of the night.

"Oh," said Belarus. The girl appeared to be in deep thought for several minutes. Then, finally, she spoke.

"Russia's clothes will be too large for you, but it's better than nothing until you get that out of your jacket. I know which ones he won't miss, and there are some that he doesn't keep upstairs, so he'll never know. I'll go get them for you. Meet me in your room, all right?"

Even if Lithuania had wanted to argue, he didn't have time. Belarus was gone almost before she finished her last sentence.

Sighing, the brunet Baltic left Estonia's room, and, after locking the door behind him, walked slowly to his own room. Looking down at his jacket, he suddenly felt disgusted with himself. Not wanting to wear the bloodstained jacket any longer, he pulled it off, followed by his shirt, which was also stained, although not as badly.

There was a knock on his door. Belarus.

"C-come in," Lithuania said. He was facing away from the doorway…and it wasn't until he heard Belarus gasp that he realized what a stupid mistake he had made, taking off his shirt when he knew Belarus would be coming back. Now there would be no denying the truth of the things that had happened to him behind locked doors.

"W-well…" he said shakily, "N-now you have y-your proof…"

* * *

><p>Belarus barely heard Lithuania's words.<p>

_"So…so many scars…" _Belarus thought, _"What could possibly…?_

"What did that?" she said aloud.

"A whip, probably some shards of glass…" Lithuania listed, sounding incredibly bitter, "A metal pipe…"

Belarus gasped.

_"Scars…he spoke of scars… And I didn't believe him… And Russia…"_

"He didn't…" she said, her voice coming out barely audible.

"Yes, he did," Lithuania said, "You have no reason not to believe me now. Can…can I please have that shirt?"

Belarus ignored him, although she did step closer.

"Why…why would my brother do that?" she asked, staring at Lithuania's scars, half hoping they would magically heal and prove this entire thing a dream.

"I don't know," Lithuania said, "I just don't know."

There was a long, awkward silence, and then Belarus decided that she might as well give Lithuania the shirt.

"Here," she said, "If Russia misses it, tell him I gave it to you. And if he doesn't believe you, call for help."

"That wouldn't do any good," Lithuania said, pulling the shirt on, "You can't hear me, where he'd take me to punish me. Trust me. The walls on this side of the house are thin, but on your side…on your side, they're very thick. That's why you never knew any of this was happening."

"No," said Belarus, "I never knew because I wanted to keep on believing that my brother was the wonderful person I always thought he was. Looking back now, I see that I should have noticed the signs that he was hurting you badly. Sometimes, you would disappear for days, and I never took any notice. It…it was _nice_ when you disappeared, because there was one less person bothering me..."

She could see that her words had hurt Lithuania, and somewhere, deep inside, she felt guilty.

"I was jealous of you," she said, unable to keep the bitterness out of her voice, "That was stupid of me, wasn't it? It just seemed as if Russia paid more attention to you."

"That night…" Lithuania said, "That night you let me out of my room when Estonia locked me in… You said, later on that night, that I was Russia's favorite. I wanted to explain then, but it's different with you. You're his sister. He wouldn't…hurt you…like that."

"At that time," Belarus said, "I was also lying. I couldn't sleep that night, and it was not the first time. First, Estonia disappeared. Then you disappeared. And then, Latvia. There was something not right about it, and I wanted to find out. The walls really must be thicker in the rooms Ukraine and I stay in, because on your side, I could hear screaming. It was Estonia that night, wasn't it?"

Lithuania nodded, and Belarus could see pain in his eyes again.

"That was the night when I first started to wonder if he would be okay," Lithuania said, "I should have done something then, should have watched him…"

"You are powerless to do anything to stop these things from occurring," Belarus said, "All you can do without risking your life and sanity any further is to sit by quietly. However…I _can_ do something."

Lithuania's eyes widened, and Belarus could sense his fear almost as if it were her own.

"W-what are you going to do?" Lithuania whispered.

"I am going to talk to Russia," Belarus said, "And I am going to tell him exactly what I think about all this."

"You can't!" Lithuania gasped, "He'll kill you!"

Belarus felt her annoyance with the Baltic nation coming back. Of all the unpredictable, panicky people on earth, Lithuania was the absolute worst. One moment, he would be doing something completely hot-headed, and the next, he would try to convince everyone else _not_ to act impulsively.

"You said it yourself," she said, "I'm his sister. He won't hurt me, and, even if he tried, I can defend myself."

"Your knife is still on the floor in Russia's room!" Lithuania protested, "You don't have a weapon!"

Belarus's annoyance with Lithuania reached its peak, and, reaching into her pocket, she whipped out another knife and pointed it at Lithuania, who looked incredibly surprised and more than a little afraid.

"Listen to me, Lithuania," Belarus hissed, "You are in no position to give me orders, so do not try. I, however, can give you as many orders as I like. And now, I will give you an order. You are not to go upstairs until I return. If you do, I will make you wish you were dead. Do you understand?"

Despite her mental protests that she most definitely did not feel sorry about threatening Lithuania, something deep inside was making Belarus feel guilty.

_"He's been through enough without you torturing him."_

Trying to ignore what she assumed was her conscience, Belarus turned away, slipping the knife back into her pocket. However, she paused in the doorway and looked back at Lithuania. The brunet Baltic was still sitting on his bed, staring after her fearfully.

"Thank you for your concern," she said quietly, not sure if he could even hear her, "Toris."

* * *

><p>Latvia was frightened. He had been woken in the night by gunshots and urgent voices in the hallway. Lithuania… Belarus… Ukraine… Where was Estonia? Why were Belarus and Ukraine in the Baltics' hallway?<p>

And then he heard Lithuania's voice, low and urgent, saying that someone had to be stopped, heard a quick exchange between Belarus and Lithuania, and listened as Lithuania's footsteps faded away.

_"Who was Lithuania going to stop?" _Latvia thought, _"Russia? Or… No, it's not Estonia… I won't believe that…"_

The small nation wrapped his arms around his pillow, which didn't do much to comfort him, as this pillow was not particularly comfortable in the first place. He was frightened, and he wanted to know what was going on. But at the same time, he was too afraid to leave his room, too afraid to go out into the potentially dangerous world outside.

"It'll be better in the morning," Latvia whispered, clutching his pillow tighter, "It'll all be fine in the morning."

But, although he tried to reassure himself, Latvia knew deep inside that things were rarely better in the morning.

"I'm scared," Latvia whimpered, "I'm scared… Where's Lithuania? Where's Estonia? It's too quiet now…it was too loud before… What's going on?"

But there was no one there to answer his question, and so Latvia spent most of the night alone, worrying, until he finally fell into a fitful sleep, filled with dreams of guns and anger, blood and…insanity.

* * *

><p><strong>Oh, look, Latvia actually did something...for about twenty seconds. He'll have a bigger role later on though, and I'm sure about that this time! <strong>

**I honestly have no idea how long this fic will be. I've written up to midway through chapter seven, and I don't foresee things ending very quickly, considering where I'm at. So, this fic could be a lot longer than the previous ones. It may also end up getting a very short hiatus while I write some non-violent story to give my relatives for Christmas... But I'll worry about that when my mom tries to kill me for writing this instead of some fluffy thing.**

**Anyways, please review, it makes Shadow very happy (and makes her write fast)! ;) And I will (hopefully) talk to you all again on Friday!**


	6. Chapter 6

**And now, my friends, the answering of the guest review! **

**Guest: Thanks for the review! :D **

**I'm glad everyone seems to like the little hints of LietBel that my inner fangirl keeps dropping...because I cannot keep that fangirl under control. XD **

**Yep...she finally knows. As to how he'll take it, you may not find out right away...but you will soon! ;)**

**I have the same problem. I already know one of my characters whom I plan to write about is going to make everything depressing. Thanks for the well-wishes though, I'll need them! **

* * *

><p>Chapter Six:<p>

Belarus still wanted to believe that all this was a lie, or a dream. In less than three hours, everything she thought she knew about her brother had been shattered, and replaced by a terrifying nightmare.

But it was not a lie. Lithuania's scars had proved that to her, as had Estonia's actions. Belarus could think of few things that could have driven the normally calm and reserved Estonia to madness...and being beaten nearly to death multiple times was very high on her list of things that could have done it just at the present moment.

So, she would confront Russia, and she would tell him exactly what she thought of him…and hope she came out of it relatively unharmed. Until this night, Belarus had been absolutely certain that Russia would never willingly harm her. But after seeing the injuries he had inflicted on Lithuania, his supposed 'favorite' out of the Baltics, she was no longer sure.

The girl marched into Russia's room, and found Ukraine there, sitting on the bed, looking at Russia with a worried expression.

"Sister," Russia said to Ukraine, "I am fine. There is no need for you to be worrying about me."

"But this is a serious thing," Ukraine said, "Russia, you could have been seriously hurt. Why didn't you call for help?"

"I could have been handling what happened," Russia said, "Lithuania coming in was not being of the necessity."

"Ukraine," Belarus said, "I need to speak with Russia. Alone."

Ukraine instantly looked even more worried.

"What's the matter, Belarus?" she asked, wringing her hands, "What has happened now?"

"Nothing has happened," said Belarus, although something _had_ in fact happened. "I just want to talk to big brother. And I need to speak with him _alone_."

Both Russia and Ukraine looked nervous now, and, perhaps for the first time, Belarus felt a bit annoyed with herself. Her obsession with Russia was making things difficult for her now.

"I won't hurt you, Russia," she said, "See? I am calm."

"Da, I am seeing that," Russia said, "But I am not understanding why you are wanting to speak with me at this time…?"

"I have something that I need to discuss with you," Belarus said quietly, "It is urgent. If it hadn't been, I would have waited to talk to you until you were feeling better."

Russia paused, still looking nervous.

_"It makes sense for him to be on edge," _Belarus thought, _"After what happened with Estonia, I would be."_

"Is okay, I suppose," Russia said finally, "Ukraine, you can be going now."

Ukraine looked as if she wanted to protest, but then she nodded and left the room.

"So," Russia said, "What is it you are wanting, little sister?"

"You lied," Belarus said, "You told us that you weren't doing anything bad to them."

Russia looked extremely surprised.

"What are you speaking of?" he asked.

"You know what I am speaking of," Belarus said, "Why did you hurt them?"

"I am not understanding," Russia said.

"Yes, Russia, you do understand," Belarus said, "Perhaps you thought that I would ignore this if I ever found out, because of my obsession with you. I am beginning to reconsider my views on you, brother. Tell me why you hurt them. Tell me why you hurt the Baltics."

"They were needing to be punished…" Russia said, "And I…"

"Punished?" Belarus said, her voice dropping to a dangerously soft tone, "What I saw were not the marks of punishment. Torture. You _tortured _them."

"Belarus, I…"

"No, Russia!" Belarus snapped, "Do not speak! I have seen enough to know exactly what you did to them, and there is no use trying to conceal the truth. I saw Lithuania's scars, and now I know what you have been doing this whole time. There is no reason for you to lie to me any longer."

As Belarus tried to see whether this was having any effect on Russia, all she saw was confusion.

"I was helping them," Russia mumbled.

"So, you were helped by pain?" Belarus asked, "Did being hurt help you, brother?"

Russia was silent.

"Brother," Belarus said, "Russia. What you have done to them is _wrong_. You have hurt them, when you said that you were not. I saw Lithuania's scars. I know what you have done, and I am not pleased. I love you-you know that-but you will have to stop this behavior. You have scarred them beyond belief, perhaps even beyond recovery. Lithuania, who never stops smiling, was _crying_. How often does he cry, when there is no one to see him? He has tried so hard to keep what you have done a secret because he is afraid of what you will do to him. The others, I don't know much about. But I do know this-Estonia's actions this night were premeditated. Hatred does not just come about without a reason. You drove him to this. Russia…you are not what I thought you were. I am disappointed in you for lying, and in myself for not seeing the truth sooner."

And then, too angry to wait for Russia's reply, Belarus turned and marched out of the room, leaving her brother behind.

* * *

><p>Lithuania wondered how long it would be until Estonia woke up. He almost hoped that it would be a while, if only so he could rest first. But there would be no time to rest, not until he had explained what had happened.<p>

And he had to explain, had to try to make Estonia understand.

Because if he didn't, then he had no idea what would become of his friend.

Lithuania was sitting on the edge of his bed, trying to get up the courage to go and check on Estonia. He didn't want to. He just wanted to stay in his room and sleep. It had to be almost midnight, maybe later. And he was so tired…

However, all his exhaustion vanished when he heard his door squeak open. Lithuania jumped, but when he looked up, he saw Belarus staring at him.

"H-how'd it go?" he asked, hoping his voice didn't sound as tired as he felt.

"You did not lie," Belarus said, "Russia did not hurt me…but he did not deny what he did, either. I have made some grave errors in judgment."

"We all do that," Lithuania said, "You're not the only one. I tried to change Russia for a long time, because I thought there was good in him…but it just…didn't work. I'm still trying, even though I know now that it won't do any good. Because…I guess I can't give up on the idea that somewhere inside him, he's not as bad as he seems."

"But I ignored every sign of what was really going on," Belarus said, "_You_ don't do that. You accept life as it is, and then try to change it."

"I don't have a choice but to accept it," Lithuania said, "Unless I want to spend the rest of my life locked in the basement."

"What _is_ in the basement?" Belarus asked.

"A lot of bloodstains," Lithuania said, "I don't know what else. I don't exactly go exploring down there."

There was a long silence.

"And besides," Lithuania said quietly, "I did ignore signs of what was happening…not with Russia, but with Estonia. I…should have known…"

"Stop blaming yourself for that," Belarus said, "No one wants to believe that someone they care about has lost their mind. I know that now, if I didn't before. I don't think you'll listen to me, but I'm going to say this anyways. You are not to blame yourself, or take responsibility for this. We _all_ share the blame, you, me, and Russia, he for driving Estonia to do what he did, and I for not seeing what was happening to you and the others sooner and doing something. Out of the three of us, you are the least at fault. All you could have done better was…"

"Protected him," Lithuania said bitterly, "I could have protected him, like I'm supposed to."

"Supposed to?" Belarus asked, "What…are you speaking of?"

"It's my _job_ to protect Latvia and Estonia," Lithuania said, "It always has been. Why do you think I stay here? If I tried, maybe I could get out. But I can't leave them, and… I failed. I failed to protect them."

He looked up, and saw that Belarus was staring at him.

"I was very wrong about you," the girl said quietly, "You don't even try to act like you are brave…but you are."

* * *

><p>Belarus had no idea what was driving her actions anymore. With Russia, she saw now, it had been obsession, an obsession that had made her brother fear her.<p>

But in the past days, and especially on this night, her obsession was no longer the driving force behind her actions. That obsession had faded slowly over the past weeks, as she began to suspect that Russia was hiding something from her, and it had finally left her on this night.

And now, she was doing things that she would never have done for anyone before. She was looking out for other people, helping other people, trying to understand the meaning behind their actions.

Or, at least, she was helping one person, a person who she was still fairly certain that she didn't care about at all.

Belarus wondered if Lithuania was asleep, or if he was waiting for her to come back. She hoped he had gone to sleep. She hadn't forced him to stay in his room while she went to guard Estonia's door for him to stay awake. He looked exhausted. He had looked exhausted hours ago, when she had first come to him seeking answers to her questions.

_"It was such a short time ago,"_ the girl thought, _"Less than a day, but so much has changed. Everything I thought I knew about the others has been reversed. Where I once thought I saw perfection, I now see insanity. And in a place where I saw only things that annoyed me, I see…bravery?"_

She tried to get her mind back on the task at hand, but couldn't seem to.

_"I should not have told Russia anything that had to do with Lithuania," _she said, _"Because of what I said to him, if he has any sense at all, he will realize how I came to find out about what he has done."_

And, she realized, she didn't want Lithuania to become involved in her quarrel with Russia.

_"He has suffered enough. But then, how can he _not_ become involved in this? It is obvious that Estonia would not tell me, nor Latvia, and so the logical choice is…Lithuania. But if I had not practically told Russia that Lithuania was the one who told me…"_

She scolded herself for thinking this way, for assuming the worst. Surely Russia wouldn't hurt Lithuania for such a thing as telling something that should never have been a secret in the first place? What kind of person would do that?

She would not allow Lithuania to be hurt. But she was unsure of why she felt that determination.

_"I barely know him. All that I thought I knew has been proven wrong this night."_

But, as she remembered how tired and sad he had looked, sitting on the edge of his bed, wearing Russia's shirt, which was much too big for him, she realized that she did know one thing.

_"I feel sorry for him. I feel that he has suffered enough, been through enough, while I have been through nothing. I know nothing of his pain. And seeing what has become of Estonia, what has become of Russia, I do not want another to go down that road to insanity. I will…keep him safe…from my brother?"_

And that, she decided, was the extent of her thoughts on the subject of Lithuania.

But as she continued to think over the issue, she felt herself beginning to doubt her ability to keep Lithuania safe. After spending so long following her brother, supporting his every move, could she really turn her back on him in favor of helping the Baltics? She wasn't sure.

_"If someone had asked me before this night whether I would save Russia or Lithuania, I would have answered 'Russia' in an instant. But now…now I am no longer sure. Russia or Lithuania…? Ivan…or Toris?"_

* * *

><p>It had been completely against his will that Lithuania ended up staying in his room for the remainder of the night. For some reason he could not quite grasp, Belarus was dead set on standing guard outside Estonia's room herself.<p>

"The moment he stirs, I will come get you," the blonde nation had assured Lithuania, "You have my word."

He hadn't wanted to let her push him into staying in his room, but he had no energy to disagree. And, in a way, Belarus was even more intimidating than Russia…and Lithuania still wasn't sure he was safe from her. The way she had pulled a knife on him earlier that night made him doubt his safety, although he thought he had seen a hint of kindness in her as well...

He planned to stay awake, planned to be on alert when Belarus came back. But he was so tired…and he hated himself for what he had done, what he had let Russia do to Estonia. Alone in the darkness, he had no way to stop the tears that would inevitably come. He did not remember the exact moment that he fell asleep, only remembered crying uncontrollably, whispering to himself.

"I'm sorry… I'm so sorry… I didn't want to… I had to… I'm sorry…"

He awoke the moment he felt a hand touch his shoulder.

"Lithuania?" Belarus said quietly, staring down at him, "It is morning."

"M-morning?" Lithuania echoed, "Y-you…"

"I stayed awake all night," Belarus said impassively, "It is not the first time. I wouldn't have woken you so early, but Estonia is waking up, and he does not sound pleased."

Those were the words Lithuania had both hoped for and dreaded. And now, his hope was completely obliterated by dread.

_"What can I possibly say to Estonia that will show him I didn't want to hurt him?"_

More than anything, he wanted to tell Belarus that he couldn't do this, he couldn't face Estonia after what he had done. But he had no choice, because there was no one else to explain. He would have to go, alone, and face the person whom he had literally _killed_ less than twelve hours ago…and hope that Estonia would understand.

* * *

><p><strong>So, that was a long, confusing, weird chapter. Next update should be on Sunday or Monday, depending on whether or not I get online Sunday. Reviews act as headache medicine, something I desperately need just now! ;)<strong>


	7. Chapter 7

**Ok, I admit this should have been updated yesterday... My only excuse is that I was reading a really good LietBel fanfiction called "Dancing Sunflowers", and that distracted me. So, if you want to know why Shadow got distracted, go read that. (Go read it anyways. It's amazing.)**

**Guest: Thank you for the review! Hmm, I hadn't intended it to be that sad, but I guess it kind of is a little bit... (I'm weird too. We can be weird together. ;) ) I'm glad you liked that scene! I had been a little worried about how it turned out. Yeah, I guess Estonia could go either way. (I never thought of that! And I hate waking up early, so one would think... XD)**

* * *

><p>Chapter Seven:<p>

Lithuania paused for a moment before he opened the door to Estonia's room. He was frightened, although he didn't want to admit it.

_"What if he's still as crazy as he was last night?" _the brunet Baltic thought, _"I can't handle him like that!"_

But there was one upside, and that was the fact that Estonia would be unarmed this time. And so would Lithuania. He would not make the mistake of killing his friend twice.

He looked back, down the long hallway, but all he saw was a flash of blue clothes as Belarus disappeared around the corner. Lithuania sighed, and then knocked on Estonia's door. There was no answer, and after knocking once more, he pushed the door open.

Estonia was sitting on the bed, hugging his legs to his chest, and staring blankly off into space. He didn't seem to register Lithuania's presence at all.

"Estonia?" Lithuania said softly.

He saw Estonia stiffen, but for a moment, he was still not sure that the other nation had heard him. Then, Estonia looked over at him, and Lithuania saw in his friend's eyes confusion, fear, pain, and…betrayal.

"D-don't touch me!" Estonia whispered. "Go away!"

"Estonia…" Lithuania murmured. Moving slowly, he approached the other nation, only to have Estonia cower away into the corner.

Lithuania waited, hoping Estonia's demeanor would change. But there was nothing. No sound, no movement, only shaking. Estonia was shaking a great deal, and it worried Lithuania. He could not remember a time when Estonia had been this frightened…and certainly never a time when the blonde Baltic was frightened of him!

"May I sit down?" he said softly. Estonia shook his head, and the shaking increased. Another strange thing, Lithuania realized, was the fact that Estonia refused to look at him.

"Estonia, please…" Lithuania said, placing his hand on the other nation's shoulder.

"Y-you stabbed me," Estonia whispered. He sounded so young, in that moment, that Lithuania was certain he felt his heart break.

_"I…I've played a role in destroying…a child."_

"I didn't want to," he whispered, and suddenly, Estonia's head snapped up. The blonde Baltic's foot shot out, and caught Lithuania in the midsection. Shocked, Lithuania fell backwards onto the floor, hitting his head in the process.

He cried out in pain, and for a moment, he couldn't move. By the time he recovered himself, Estonia was kneeling next to him, his expression desperate and confused.

"You stabbed me," the blonde Baltic repeated. "Why?"

Lithuania tried to order his thoughts, tried to think of a way to explain everything to Estonia. Apparently, he wasn't quick enough, because the next thing he knew, someone was pulling him up into a sitting position. Estonia was staring at him now, and he looked angry. Gone was the fear, gone was the child that Lithuania had just seen. The childishness and fear had been replaced by hurt and anger.

"Why did you do that?" Estonia repeated, his voice growing louder.

"I didn't want to, but…" Lithuania said, "Estonia… Why did _you_ do what you did? Why did you try to kill Russia?"

Estonia was silent for a long moment, and when he spoke again, Lithuania no longer recognized his voice.

"Why did I do it?" he said slowly, "Why do you think?!"

"I don't know," Lithuania murmured, "I'm trying to understand."

"You don't understand?" Estonia said. He paused for a moment, and then continued, his voice rising with every word.

"I did it for you, you bastard! Everything I did, I was trying to save you, and you turned around and stabbed me like it was nothing! Russia was right, you really don't care about me, do you?"

He shook Lithuania, apparently wanting a response, but Lithuania could only stare at him in shock.

"Do you care?!" Estonia repeated, "You can't say you do, not after what you did! You…you _killed_ me… Why…?"

Estonia let go of Lithuania's shoulders then, and moved back toward his corner.

"I did it because what you wanted to do wouldn't have worked," Lithuania said, "All that you were trying to do would have hurt a bunch of innocent people… You have to understand that…"

"So Russia is more innocent than I am, than you are, than Latvia is?" Estonia spat, "Is that it? You're still taking his side!"

"Russia doesn't understand what he's doing anymore than you do," Lithuania said, "He thinks he's helping, but you can't help him see the truth by doing to him what he does to us."

He paused for a moment, and then continued more softly, more to himself then to Estonia.

"Really…in a way…you're a lot like him now."

"Don't you _dare_ compare me to him!" Estonia screamed. The blonde Baltic was on his feet in a moment, glaring down at Lithuania.

"I am nothing like Russia!" Estonia shouted, "Don't ever say I am, or I'll hurt you! I don't care who's there to see it, compare me to that man, and I will _kill_ you!"

"Estonia!" Lithuania gasped, "Can you even hear yourself right now? You _can't_ go around killing people! That doesn't fix anything; it'll only make you hate yourself!"

Estonia glared at him, and Lithuania started to feel as if this entire thing had been absolutely pointless.

"If you're going to take Russia's side," Estonia hissed, "Get out! I don't want to talk to you!"

"Eduard, I am _not_ taking Russia's side!" Lithuania cried, "I'm only trying to help you understand…"

"All I need to understand," Estonia snapped, "Is that you never cared about me."

"W-what?" Lithuania gasped, "What are you saying?"

"Exactly what it sounds like," Estonia said. The blonde Baltic bent down and, grabbing Lithuania by the collar, pulled him up so that they were nearly on the same eye level.

"You have _never_ cared about me," Estonia said slowly, pronouncing every syllable slowly and carefully, "Never!"

"Estonia, that's a lie!" Lithuania cried, "Who told you that?"

"No one told me," Estonia said, "I figured it out for myself."

"Russia told you," Lithuania whispered, "One of those times when he had you alone, he lied to you, and you believed him. Estonia… Eduard… You're my friend, you're like my brother… How could I _not _care about you?"

"If you cared about me," Estonia said, "You wouldn't have hurt me!"

"I didn't want to!" Lithuania moaned, "I had no choice. If you were willing to shoot me, you might have done the same to Latvia… Estonia, I am _not_ the one who wants to hurt you! Russia wanted to hurt you, so he lied to you and told you I didn't care about you. But I do, I care so much, and it hurts me to see you like this… I want to help you…"

"Stop lying to me!" Estonia screamed. He let go of Lithuania's shirt, causing the other nation to fall back onto the ground. However, Lithuania was closer to the wall now, and so he fell into more or less a sitting position.

"All you do is hurt me!" Estonia hissed, "Maybe I should hurt you, and see how you like it!"

"Do what you want, Eduard," Lithuania whispered, looking up at the younger Baltic, "I won't fight you. I'm not going to hurt you anymore."

Estonia stared at him for a long moment, and there was a childish confusion mixed with the anger in his eyes that hurt Lithuania more than any physical wounds could.

"Leave," Estonia said finally, "Leave now, and don't come back."

"I have orders…" Lithuania said, "To lock you in here."

"Then do it," Estonia said, "Just leave me alone!"

And, trying to ignore how much his heart was breaking, Lithuania did.

* * *

><p>Lithuania managed to keep calm until he reached his room. Then, unable to stop himself, he threw himself onto the bed, crying.<p>

_"I'm such an idiot… I ruined everything… I'm so sorry… Estonia… I…"_

"Lithuania?" a small, scared voice asked. Latvia.

"Go downstairs," Lithuania said, "Go downstairs and tell Russia that I said to hell with all the chores."

"I'm not doing that!" Latvia squeaked, sounding extremely frightened, "What's wrong with you?"

Lithuania looked up, then, and saw how small and frightened Latvia looked. And then he remembered that he hadn't completely failed, not yet. As long as Latvia was safe and still had his sanity, that meant Lithuania hadn't completely failed to protect the people he cared about more than anything else.

"There's nothing wrong," he said, smiling in spite of himself, and quickly running a hand over his eyes to erase his tears, "Come on, let's go downstairs. It's already a little bit late, so we should get to work quickly."

Latvia looked as if he didn't quite believe that everything was okay, but Lithuania made sure to smile as much as possible…even though the last thing he wanted to do at the moment was pretend everything was okay.

But he was dreading the inevitable moment that Latvia would ask where Estonia was more than he had ever dreaded anything in his life.

* * *

><p>Estonia couldn't figure it out. He had been completely sure that Lithuania didn't care about him at all, that the other Baltic had never cared.<p>

But he kept on remembering the kind look in Lithuania's eyes as he looked up at him, his soft, quiet voice…

_"Do what you want, Eduard. I won't fight you. I'm not going to hurt you anymore."_

"Am I right?" Estonia said to himself, "Do they really not care…? Or…or… No, he doesn't care, he doesn't care about me! If he cared, then he would have stabbed Russia instead of me… Right?"

He was confused, and scared, and he kept on seeing the blade of that knife flash as Lithuania lunged at him. Every time he closed his eyes, he saw the same thing. But with his eyes open, he saw kindness in his friend's eyes, and he felt guilty about what he had almost done to Lithuania.

_"But I'm not like Russia! No matter what he says, I am nothing like Russia. For him to say that means he doesn't care. He just wants to hurt me, like everybody else… He just wants to hurt me… He doesn't care… Does he?"_

* * *

><p><strong>So, that's a chapter. Hopefully, the next one will be up on Wednesday. Also, the next chapter is probably going to be really long. I'm still working out exactly how it's going to go, but currently, it's at around 3,500 words. <strong>

**And after that chapter, I am almost completely positive that Latvia will FINALLY do something! If he doesn't, I'm going to lock him in his room so I don't have to worry about him anymore...**


	8. Chapter 8

**Eeek! I'm sorry about how late this is! I was going to post it, and then my dad took me to the movies and I got distracted and... Yeah. Anyways, I am back!**

**Guest: Thank you for reviewing! :D Yup...I'd say Estonia is all of those things.**

**Lithuania always does seem to blame himself, doesn't he? Poor guy...**

**Heehee, well, I obviously made no effort to post this on time, so... Here you go two days late! **

* * *

><p>Chapter Eight:<p>

Lithuania was determined to pretend that nothing was wrong. After all, there was nothing wrong, was there? Estonia was just taking a day off, and it was by Russia's orders. Apparently, the other nation thought Estonia needed to rest.

That was what he told Latvia, and for a little while, the younger Baltic almost seemed to believe him. But then, as they were cooking breakfast, the inevitable questioning started.

"Lithuania," Latvia said, "Why are you wearing that funny shirt?"

Lithuania looked down, and discovered that he did in fact look funny in Russia's shirt. For one thing, the sleeves were much too long, and so he had rolled them up out of his way. For another, it looked almost like a dress on him.

"I got something on mine," he said, "So I borrowed this one."

"Does Mr. Russia know you're wearing his shirt?" Latvia asked, "Won't you get in trouble?"

"I'll be fine," Lithuania said, "There's nothing to worry about. Now, breakfast is ready, so help me carry it out to the dining room, okay?"

* * *

><p>Breakfast was an extremely awkward affair, mostly due to the obvious absence of both Russia and Estonia. The remaining nations ate in silence, and Lithuania felt very on edge. Ukraine looked as if she was about to start crying, Latvia looked worried and confused, and Belarus wouldn't stop staring. At him. And that unnerved Lithuania. He was starting to get the distinct feeling that Belarus was watching him on purpose, although he wasn't sure why the girl was showing such an interest in him all of a sudden.<p>

Things got slightly less awkward after that, as he was able to get away from the others for a while. Latvia had gone off to dust, and Lithuania was washing the dishes, alone. Then, the second unexpected intrusion of the week took place. Instead of Belarus, it was Ukraine, who looked extremely anxious.

"What's the matter?" Lithuania said softly, not wanting to scare the already nervous nation.

"Russia wants to see you," Ukraine said, "He said he wanted you to go upstairs now."

_"Stay calm, stay calm … Ukraine doesn't know… Don't make things worse…"_

"All right," Lithuania said, "I'll go at once. Thank you, Ms. Ukraine."

The other nation nodded, and then scurried off, leaving Lithuania to make the journey upstairs alone.

He didn't know what he would find when he got to Russia's bedroom, but he had a good idea of what would happen. And he was afraid. There were many times that he had been beaten for something that he had never been told not to do. But this…this had been a direct violation of Russia's orders, and he would have to pay the price for his disobedience.

Lithuania felt himself starting to shake, and clenched his fists, trying to stop the shaking.

_"You are not Latvia," _he reminded himself, not for the first time, _"No shaking."_

But he was still shaking when he knocked on Russia's door.

"Come in," Russia said, and, taking a deep breath, Lithuania pushed open the door.

Russia was sitting on the edge of the bed, his faucet pipe in his hands. The other nation was staring at the pipe, and he did not look up when Lithuania entered.

"Y-you wanted me, s-sir," Lithuania asked, trying to keep his voice steady, but failing.

"Da," Russia said, sounding distracted, "I was wanting you."

"W-what for?" Lithuania asked, more to be polite than anything else. He already knew why he was there.

"You disobeyed me," Russia said, "What have I been telling you not to do all this time?"

"I…I'm not sure what you…" Lithuania stammered.

Russia looked up, and seeing the anger in his eyes, Lithuania was afraid.

"You are knowing," Russia said, "You are knowing exactly what you have done. So tell me what it is. You can do that, da?"

"I…I told B-Belarus the t-truth," Lithuania whispered.

"And what did I tell you about telling my sisters things?" Russia asked.

"Not to," Lithuania said, "But, Mr. Russia, if you can't tell your sisters what you're doing… Doesn't that make what you're doing wrong?"

"You are questioning me too?" Russia asked, sounding hurt.

"I've been questioning you for a while," Lithuania said softly, "Mr. Russia, do you feel happy right now?"

"No," Russia said.

"You don't feel happy because what Belarus said to you hurt you, right?" Lithuania asked, keeping his voice soft. A soft tone seemed to have some sort of calming effect on some people, and he was hoping Russia was one of them.

Russia nodded, looking sad, and a little confused.

"If what Belarus said hurt you," Lithuania said, "Then don't you think that hurting other people is wrong?"

Almost before Lithuania realized what was happening, Russia was standing in front of him, the faucet pipe still in his hand. Lithuania stared up at the taller nation, bracing himself for the expected strike from Russia's pipe.

"I am trying to be helping you," Russia said, "If no one is helping you, you can never be learning."

"What happened last night hurt you," Lithuania said, "But it didn't help you. Hurting people doesn't help them, Mr. Russia. It just confuses them. It makes them wonder what they did that made you angry. It makes them feel like they'll never do anything right."

"I am helping you," Russia repeated.

"That doesn't make sense, though," Lithuania said, "If being hurt makes you sad, then don't you think it makes other people sad? Last night…did Estonia remind you of somebody else?"

Russia's eyes narrowed, and Lithuania stepped away from him.

"Estonia is having much of the craziness," Russia said, "I am not."

"Russia…" Lithuania sighed, "Why can't you see all the parallels? I can see them."

"You are having too much of the overactive imagination," Russia said, "And even more of the disobedience. You must be having punishment for disobeying me. You should not have been telling Belarus what you did."

Lithuania glanced toward the open doorway.

"Please close the door first," he said quietly, "I don't want Latvia or…or Belarus… I don't want them to hear."

"Belarus?" Russia asked, sounding confused, "Since what time are you caring about my sister?"

The taller nation stared at Lithuania, and suddenly, a look of recognition crossed his face.

"Why are you wearing my shirt?"

"B-Belarus l-let me b-borrow it," Lithuania stammered.

"You should be staying away from my sister," Russia said, "It will be doing neither of you any of the goodness to be near each other."

Lithuania said nothing, but he suddenly began to feel a strange resentment toward Russia for telling him to stay away from Belarus.

_"Why shouldn't I speak to her if I want to?"_

"You are already thinking of how to be disobeying me next," Russia said, sounding both annoyed and amused, "_Litva_, you may be my favorite, but you must be knowing that my sister does not care about you. You have always been much of the annoyance to her. If you are thinking she will love you, it will not be happening. She is having the cold heart. No feelings, especially not for you."

Lithuania couldn't trust himself to answer, and so he merely looked away, his head bowed.

"Are you listening?" Russia asked.

"Yes, sir," Lithuania whispered.

"You are not liking to hear the truth," Russia said, "Is the truth…is the truth hurting you?"

"Yes," Lithuania said, "It hurts me a lot that you would think that about your own sister. She…she probably thinks that about you now. I know Estonia thinks you're cold."

"And what about you?" Russia asked, "What are you thinking?"

"I think someone hurt you once," Lithuania said, "And when they hurt you, they hurt you so much that you forgot how to love. You can't do anything without hurting…and that's not your fault. But I could help you learn not to hurt people…"

"Helping," Russia said, "Hurting only for a little time, to help you."

Lithuania sighed.

"We've had this conversation so many times," he said, looking up at Russia, "And every time, it ends the same. But I'm going to keep trying, because I know how bad it feels to be hurt. You're not alone, you just think you are. You don't have to be alone."

Russia stared at him for a long moment. Then, the taller nation shook his head.

"No, _Litva_," he said, "It is seeming to me that we will never be changing the ending of this talk we have so often."

"Then close the door," Lithuania whispered, "And let's end the painful part quickly."

* * *

><p>Belarus was worried. In the few minutes that she had been in her room, Lithuania seemed to have disappeared.<p>

_"If I was right about Russia punishing him for telling me about what has been happening to the Baltics…"_

She didn't want to assume the worst yet. Maybe Lithuania had had to run an errand. She would investigate that possibility first. And the person who would be most likely to know where Lithuania had gone was Latvia.

However, the smallest Baltic appeared extremely nervous already, and he hadn't even noticed her watching him yet. Latvia was currently putting away the dishes, and Belarus was standing in the doorway to the kitchen, watching him.

"Latvia," the girl said, her voice coming out louder than she had meant it to.

What happened next startled her. When he heard the sound of her voice, Latvia jumped, and when he did, the plate he was holding slipped out of his hand and fell onto the floor.

They both stood there in silence for a moment, staring at the shattered plate. Then, Belarus looked up, and saw how frightened Latvia looked.

"We won't tell Russia," she said, surprising herself. "Come on, let's pick it up. We have enough plates that he won't miss one if we hurry and pick it up."

If Latvia's amazed expression was anything to go by, it was quite obvious that the small nation had expected her to tell Russia that he had broken the plate. Belarus planned to do no such thing, and if someone _did_ tell Russia, then she would say that she had broken the plate. Simple enough.

"Where's Lithuania?" Belarus asked as they disposed of the glass shards.

Latvia looked frightened again, and Belarus decided that it was probably a good time to assume the worst.

"He was supposed to be doing the dishes," Latvia said, "But when I came in here to help, he was gone."

"He couldn't have gone to run an errand for Russia?" Belarus asked.

"If he had gone out the front door, I would've seen him," Latvia whispered.

Belarus nodded.

"Keep putting away dishes, and don't drop any more. If you do drop something, just get rid of it like we just did."

"W-why are you looking for Lithuania?" Latvia stuttered.

"I made a promise to myself," Belarus said, "So I'm going to keep it now."

* * *

><p>Belarus tried to get upstairs quickly, but it wasn't easy, especially as Ukraine seemed to be trying her absolute best to keep her sister from going anywhere near Russia's room.<p>

"He doesn't want anyone in there!" Ukraine said, wringing her hands.

"Lithuania's in there," Belarus said.

"You don't need to know what Lithuania is doing," Ukraine said, "You don't have to check on Russia every five seconds, you know."

"This is _not_ about checking on Russia," Belarus said, "This is about keeping Lithuania safe."

"You don't even like him," Ukraine mumbled, "Belarus, you're acting very strange. Lithuania's in no danger, and neither is Russia!"

"You know nothing!" Belarus hissed, "If you went upstairs now, you would see how little you know. Now let me pass, or come with me!"

Ukraine looked as if she wanted to protest, but, as Belarus had expected, the older girl's personal experience prevented her from stopping Belarus. The girl ran on past her sister, and met no further interruption.

However, as she got closer to Russia's room, she could hear muffled screams, which grew louder as she approached.

"Stop this at once!" Belarus yelled as she burst into the room, brandishing her knife.

"Get out!" Russia replied, "You are not needed here, little sister."

Belarus examined the scene. It looked to her as if she was needed, considering that Lithuania was currently kneeling on the floor with his hands over his head, presumably to protect himself from Russia's faucet pipe.

"I told you," she said, "Not to hurt them anymore."

"I am the leader of this family," Russia said, "You cannot be giving me the orders."

"Then perhaps," Belarus said, "You should not be the leader of this family anymore."

Her words had the desired effect. Russia appeared to have temporarily forgotten about Lithuania, instead advancing on Belarus.

"It is being much of the funniness," Russia said, "That this one…"

He paused, gesturing toward Lithuania, who still had not moved.

"This one is always causing everyone else to be much of the disobedience."

"It is not he who causes pain," Belarus said, "Leave him alone. If you want to hurt someone, then hurt me."

Russia looked extremely puzzled.

"You are _wanting_ to be hurt?"

"If it means you will stop hurting the Baltics…" Belarus said slowly, "Then yes."

"No!"

Lithuania's outburst startled them all. The brunet Baltic was standing now, but he looked as if he might collapse again at any moment.

"She hasn't done anything, and she's your sister," Lithuania said, "You won't hurt her."

Belarus glared at the other nation, hoping she could somehow intimidate him into being quiet. However, it appeared that this had no effect on Lithuania any more. Somehow, he seemed to become braver when he was being tortured.

"You won't hurt your sister," Lithuania repeated.

Russia paused for a moment, looking as if he didn't quite know what to do about this situation.

Belarus herself was unsure of what to do now. It was as if Lithuania's words had summoned back some of the love she had once felt for Russia. Of course, he was her brother! He wouldn't hurt her…

And then Russia had turned back to Lithuania, leaving Belarus still standing in the doorway.

"Da," Russia said, "You are right. I would not be hurting my sister. You were the one who was starting this problem, so we will be finishing it with you."

Belarus could see pain behind the mask of Lithuania's smile. He was hurt already, although he was trying not to show it, and she was not going to allow anyone else to be in pain. Seeing the violence inflicted by Russia and Estonia, she had begun to wonder what would drive someone to cause such pain. But it was years of pain, inflicted on them by others, that had caused them to harden, to become the very thing that had destroyed them.

And she feared seeing anyone else like that, enraged, brandishing a weapon, ready to hurt or even kill. She would not let Lithuania be the next to go insane.

But she was afraid, and a part of her still wanted to believe that Russia's actions really were for the best. Surely her brother knew the right course of action? He always had before, after all.

_"No!" _Belarus thought, _"He was not doing right before, and he is not doing right now! You were blinded by obsession, and you wanted to believe he was doing right because of your love for him. But you must see now with eyes unclouded. Russia is not perfect. Neither is Lithuania, but Lithuania is innocent, while Russia… Russia is insane."_

Before she could collect her thoughts further, an agonized cry shattered the silence and jumbled her confused thoughts even more.

_"No more," _Belarus thought, and then, almost without realizing what she was doing, she went into action.

Russia had his faucet pipe raised to strike Lithuania again, and just as the pipe came down, Belarus reached up for it, barely managing to avoid being hit. As it was, it was exceedingly difficult for the girl to keep hold of the pipe, especially when Russia began pulling on it.

"Belarus, be letting go now!" Russia commanded, tugging on the pipe.

"No!" Belarus said, struggling to maintain her grip, "You will not hurt him anymore."

"You will be stopping this interfering!" Russia said, "You are not wanting to end up like Estonia…"

"Estonia…?" Belarus echoed.

"All of this was starting when Estonia suddenly began deciding to be a hero," Russia said, "I am thinking he has secretly been getting some of the tips from America."

"Estonia protected Latvia," said Lithuania. Belarus couldn't see the Baltic nation from where she was standing, but she could hear the pain in his voice, "He protected Latvia because there was no one else to do it. I…I was unconscious upstairs… The real reason this started was…because _I_ failed."

"No," said Belarus, "This started with Russia, long ago. Russia was hurt, and so…"

"You have been spending too much of the time with Lithuania!" Russia interrupted, "I am thinking I was liking you better when you were being of the creepiness. Stop with the silly interfering."

"Never," Belarus said.

"Then I will be stopping you!" Russia said, and then, somehow, he managed to pull his pipe out of Belarus's hands, and then turned to her. But there was still a bit of restraint in his actions, perhaps some reluctance to hurt a person who had once loved him, although it had been a strange and disturbing love.

Before Belarus could brace herself for the impact of the expected blow, she found herself being pushed roughly aside. The force of the blow sent her sprawling on the floor, and by the time she had recovered partially, Russia had turned back to Lithuania. But instead of striking the brunet Baltic, Russia grabbed Lithuania's arm, and, pulling him over to where Belarus was kneeling on the floor, pushed the smaller nation to his knees.

"Now," said Russia, "There will be no more of the silliness or the heroics, da?"

"You can't stop me from standing up to you!" Belarus hissed.

"I think I can be stopping you," said Russia, "If either of you is moving to stop this punishment, then it will be hurting longer. As a matter of the fact…if you are doing anymore of the interfering, then I will be going to get Estonia. He will be needing punishment for his actions last night, but I had been intending to be waiting until he had been somewhat of the recovered."

Belarus glanced at Lithuania, and saw the brunet Baltic bow his head in defeat.

_"The strong must take the punishment to save the weak," _Belarus thought, _"But there should be no need for anyone to suffer."_

Subconsciously, she moved closer to Lithuania, and to her surprise, the other nation moved closer as well.

It wasn't until the first strike hit her that Belarus truly realized exactly how hard it was not to cry out when you were in pain. And the pain just seemed to get worse with every blow.

There was no restraint now, only pain, and Belarus soon realized how easy it would be to go insane under these circumstances.

_"How do they…stand it?"_

After a while, it became hard to focus on anything. But at some point, amid the pain and the screams that might have been her own or might have belonged to someone else entirely, Belarus became aware that someone's hand had slipped into her own. And it comforted her, although she could not quite remember why she was there, or why she would ever be holding Lithuania's had.

It was hard to see details, hard to hear anything beyond her own cries of pain. But she did notice when the beating unexpectedly stopped. For a moment, she stayed still, trying to steady her breathing. And that was when she heard a familiar voice calling.

"Russia? Russia, what is going on up there?"

It was Ukraine. Belarus had no idea what the older girl was doing there, but she was grateful for Ukraine's completely accidental interruption.

Russia glanced toward the doorway, and then looked down at Lithuania and Belarus.

"You will be staying here," he said, apparently deciding that he would not allow his other sister to discover the truth, "I will be coming back soon."

And then he was gone, leaving Lithuania and Belarus alone.

Belarus tried desperately to steady her breathing. But as she did, she became aware of the full extent of the pain throughout her body. The girl whimpered slightly, and immediately felt angry with herself for showing any signs of weakness.

She looked over at Lithuania, and saw that the brunet Baltic was leaning against the wall. His eyes were half-closed, but she could see that he was watching her. She could also see that she was crying.

Belarus tried to smile at him, but found herself unable to. Instead, gritting her teeth to try and keep herself quiet despite the pain, she moved closer to Lithuania. To her surprise, he put one arm around her.

She stayed still, unsure of what he was doing, but feeling somehow safe with him there. After a few minutes, Lithuania put his other arm around her. Belarus tried to stay sitting up, not wanting to hurt Lithuania by leaning against him.

"Is okay," Lithuania whispered, "You can lean on me. It doesn't hurt that much anyways."

She wanted to tell him that she didn't need him, that she would be fine without him there. But, somehow, she did need him. And she thought, although it might have been only a thought, and nothing more… She thought that he might need her too. And so, she did not pull away, but leaned against him.

They stayed that way for a long time, Belarus leaning against Lithuania, and he leaning against the wall. Once, she looked up at him, and a tear fell from his eye and landed on her face.

"I'm sorry," Lithuania whispered, and she knew that he was not speaking of the fact that his tears were falling on her.

"There is nothing…nothing to be sorry for," she murmured, "You are not the cause of the pain."

But no matter how she tried to reassure him that it was not his fault, Lithuania still cried.

* * *

><p><strong>And that, my friends, is the chapter! The LONG chapter, which turned out to be nothing like I'd planned it. Oh, well.<strong>

**Oh my gravy! I just realized that this story now has twenty reviews! :D You guys are amazing! *sends virtual hugs to you all* **

**I am not saying when the next chapter will come, because I am tired of making promises and not keeping them. So...it will come sometime. ;) And hopefully I won't spend the whole weekend procrastinating and watching anime instead of writing... I make no promises, though.  
><strong>


	9. Chapter 9

**Shadow has returned! And Latvia WILL do something in this chapter! Oh my gravy, you guys... I did not expect all the positive feedback I got last chapter! Thank YOOOUUUUUU! Okay, maybe I'm overdramatic, but seriously! That made my day!**

**Shall now answer the guest review. ;)**

**Guest: Thank you for reviewing! :D I was a bit scared for those two myself when I was writing that chapter... I hadn't planned what happened at all, so I didn't really know what was going on. I'm pretty sure Russia has no idea how terrifying he is... *sigh* Someone needs to explain it to him.**

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><p>Chapter Nine:<p>

Latvia was scared. There was definitely something wrong, and no one would tell him what. Actually, there was no one left to tell him. Estonia, Lithuania, Belarus, and Russia had all disappeared, and he wasn't going to go looking for Ukraine. It wasn't that he was scared of her, it was just that he didn't think she would know any more about what was going on than he did. No, he definitely wasn't silly and childish enough to be scared of Ukraine. Definitely not scared.

But as time wore on, and neither Lithuania nor Belarus appeared, Latvia began to be more than a little nervous. Finally, he decided to check upstairs for Lithuania. He had done all his chores anyways, so Russia wouldn't get mad at him… Would he? Anyways, it was likely that Lithuania would be up in his room. And if he wasn't…then Latvia would panic.

The small nation shivered as he tiptoed upstairs. It was scary being alone, without Lithuania or Estonia to reassure him that everything was all right.

Latvia remembered the days he had spent locked in Russia's attic, alone. It was an experience he never wanted to repeat. The loneliness, the cold… He had spent so many days and nights huddled there in the cold, wanting to fall asleep but not being able to because of the shivering. Usually, when he got too cold, he would sneak over to Lithuania's room. The older nation didn't seem to mind sharing a bed with him sometimes, and Latvia had once asked if Lithuania got cold at night too. The other nation hadn't given him a direct answer, only smiled and said that no matter how warm his blankets were, another person made things much, much warmer.

He went to Estonia sometimes, when Lithuania was already asleep. But Latvia felt as if he bothered the bespectacled Baltic with his presence, and he only went to Estonia's room at night when he absolutely had to.

Now, as he trotted down the empty hallway, Latvia remembered the cold loneliness of the attic, and felt slightly comforted knowing that surely nothing could be as bad as those days. Nothing could possibly get that bad again. Could it?

He didn't think it could. He remembered that on one of the many cold nights, he had gotten an unexpected visitor, although how he had gotten to the attic, Latvia never figured out. Estonia had come to get him, but they hadn't even been able to make it out of the attic. Well…Estonia had left, but not in the way Latvia thought the older Baltic had probably planned to. Russia had thrown Estonia down the stairs.

_"Estonia's up here, right?" _Latvia thought, having found himself confronted with Lithuania's conspicuously empty room, _"Maybe he knows where Lithuania is."_

It was with this thought in mind that the boy went to knock on Estonia's door. For a few moments, there was no answer. But then, just when Latvia was about to give up and go back downstairs, he heard a quiet voice answer him.

"Come in."

And Latvia obeyed, although he thought that there was something not quite right about Estonia's voice. It sounded too…too tired and too broken to be Estonia. But surely that was just his imagination.

* * *

><p>Estonia already regretted having told whoever was at the door to come in. It was probably just Lithuania, and he didn't feel like dealing with the other nation at this particular moment.<p>

But, to his surprise, when the door opened, it only opened partway. As Estonia tried to figure out this strange phenomenon, he saw a small, blonde figure peeking around the door at him.

_"Latvia…" _Estonia thought, _"Why is he here? Lithuania wouldn't let him come see me. And anyways… If he cared, wouldn't he have come to see me sooner?"_

With Latvia, it would have been easy to believe that the young nation really cared, were it not for one particular incident. The night Estonia had tried his best to release Latvia from captivity in Russia's attic…and ended up being thrown down the stairs.

And Latvia had done nothing. He had just stood there, looking down at him, and then he had run away, and left Estonia _alone_, and Estonia hated being alone because it was just so scary feeling like no one cared about you, and…

"Estonia?" Latvia said timidly, "Can I come in?"

Estonia considered the question for a moment. It was easy enough to resent Latvia when the boy was not around. But now that he was there, Estonia realized that it would be terribly hard to turn his friend away. And, besides, Latvia was so easily scared… What had happened on that one night didn't necessarily mean that his younger friend didn't care about him. All it meant was that Latvia had been frightened, and so he had gone back to safety, because that was what any normal person would have done.

But there was still the part of his mind that insisted that no one cared about him, that he should kill them all and leave this place. And it was that part that he fought to keep from taking over now.

_"I will not hurt Latvia. I must not hurt him… He's just a kid…"_

And then he was talking, without even realizing that he had come to a decision.

"Sure," he said, "You can come in."

Latvia's movements were hesitant, timid, and for a moment, Estonia wondered if his friend knew what had happened in the hours since night had fallen over Russia's mansion, the hours before the sun had once again risen, as he suspected it had now.

But, no, if Latvia knew, then he would not have come. The boy was so timid, he would never consent knowingly to being in the same room as a…

_"Murderer?" _

The thought startled Estonia, and made him angry with himself.

_"I'm not a murderer! Lithuania's a murderer! He…stabbed me…"_

"Estonia?"

Latvia's childish voice startled Estonia out of his thoughts. The smaller Baltic was standing in front of him now, looking worried.

"Are you okay?" Latvia asked, "You keep staring off at nothing."

Estonia tried to smile, but found he couldn't. Instead, he kept his face emotionless. It was easier that way.

"I'm fine, Latvia. You can sit down, you know."

Slowly, the other nation complied, although Estonia noticed that Latvia was careful not to sit too close.

"Why did you come up here?" he asked, "Aren't you supposed to be doing your chores?"

"I did all mine," Latvia said, "Well, all the regular ones. Lithuania's supposed to tell me what our other ones are, but… I can't find him anywhere."

The smaller Baltic frowned, and Estonia struggled to find an answer that wouldn't show just how little he cared about Lithuania's whereabouts.

_"Just as long as he isn't here bothering me, and telling me I was in the wrong when I wasn't, I don't care where he is!"_

But he couldn't tell Latvia that. The tiny boy already looked worried enough, and suddenly, Estonia had a new mission.

_"I have to protect him from the truth. If he doesn't know the truth, then… Then he won't hate me. He's the only thing I have left. If he hated me…"_

And so, he turned to Latvia with a smile, and hastened to reassure the younger nation that Lithuania was perfectly okay, and would probably be back soon. Even though he was almost completely sure it was an outrageous lie.

* * *

><p>Russia hadn't expected going to reassure Ukraine to take as long as it had. But his older sister had refused to be reassured, convinced she had heard screaming. Which she had, but Russia couldn't tell her that. He had already lost Belarus's love; he would not lose Ukraine's as well.<p>

But once Ukraine was comforted, he had to stay with her for a while, to make sure she wouldn't get suspicious. And it would be suspicious if he hurried off right after saying nothing was wrong.

He judged it to have been about thirty minutes from the time he had left his room to the time he returned. But in that time, Belarus and Lithuania appeared to have…fallen asleep?

Russia blinked in surprise at the two sleeping countries. Belarus was leaning on Lithuania, who had both arms wrapped around her.

"I had never been expecting this…" Russia mumbled. "She was not supposed to be associating with him in the first place, and now she is…is she liking him that much?"

He was confused. How could Belarus have gone from hating Lithuania to actually letting him become close to her so quickly? It didn't make any sense to Russia, but there was one thing he did know. It was going to stop. Belarus and Lithuania were not supposed to associate with each other in the first place, and all their friendship was doing was causing trouble. So he would make sure they weren't friends any more…even if it meant having to hurt his own sister even further. Even if it meant having to lie to her.

"Is for your safety," Russia mumbled, more to reassure himself than anything else, "You will not be having any of the good life if you are being of the friendship with Lithuania."

* * *

><p>Lithuania didn't remember falling asleep. And when he woke up, it took him a few minutes to remember where he was. At first, he thought he must be in bed, and the person he was hugging must be Latvia, who had probably come to his room to escape the cold.<p>

But this person was not small enough to be Latvia. The tiny nation was much smaller than this person. Estonia, then? But Estonia was locked in his room…

Lithuania opened his eyes, and found himself staring down at someone's extremely long blonde hair.

_"Belarus…" _he thought, suddenly remembering what had happened, _"We…we must have fallen asleep."_

His body still ached, but he knew it was time to get moving. There was no point in staying in Russia's room until the larger nation made an appearance. Russia would no doubt appear soon enough, and he would not leave Belarus behind to face his wrath.

"Belarus?" he whispered, shaking the girl as gently as he could, "Belarus, we need to get moving."

The girl began to stir, murmuring something about how there was no need to wake up. Then, suddenly, her eyes snapped open.

"Where am I?" she snapped, "What's going…?"

Then, she appeared to realize where she was. Belarus pulled away from Lithuania as quickly as possible, leaving him still leaning against the wall.

"Russia has not come back," she stated.

"He'll probably be back soon," Lithuania said, "So…we should probably leave before he comes and finds us still here."

"Agreed," Belarus said, "I… You _will_ call for help if anything goes wrong."

_"No, never," _Lithuania thought. After seeing Belarus beaten, he was even more determined not allow her to become further involved in the Baltics' troubles.

But he could not say that aloud, or she would argue with him, and didn't want to fight with her now, not here, not after what they had been through.

"Yes, Belarus," he said quietly, "I will not try to face my problems alone any longer."

"I don't believe you," Belarus muttered. Then, her fierce expression softened slightly.

"It was time for me to learn about real pain," she said, "You are not at fault for what happened to me, and I do not blame you for it."

"It _was_ my fault…" Lithuania murmured, "Please, Belarus, don't try to save me. It's far too late for that."

"How can I _not_?" Belarus retorted, "He hurts you, and you don't deserve it…"

"If you ever want to save me from Russia," Lithuania said, "Then you will first have to help me save Russia from himself."

* * *

><p>Estonia didn't want to admit it, but he was afraid of the inevitable moment when Latvia would leave him. So afraid that he invented things to talk about so his friend would stay longer.<p>

But when Latvia finally did have to leave, Estonia felt panic setting in again.

_"No, Latvia, please don't leave me alone! If you leave me alone and never come back, then I'll know no one cares for me! I know you'll probably never come back, and I'll be here alone forever! I can't… Please…"_

Latvia was halfway to the door when Estonia lunged forward and grabbed the boy's arm.

"Latvia, wait!"

The smaller nation jumped, but Estonia didn't feel guilty. He was scared, and he needed reassurance that Latvia wouldn't leave him alone forever.

"Promise me you'll come back and visit me!"

Latvia stared at him, his violet eyes wide and confused.

"E-Estonia…"

"Promise!" Estonia insisted, "Please, Latvia… I need you to come back!"

The boy was silent for a long moment. He looked confused, and slightly frightened, and it took all of Estonia's willpower not to grab Latvia's shoulders and shake him.

"I…I guess I can come back later," Latvia mumbled.

"You can't tell Lithuania!" Estonia said, "Okay?"

"Why not?" Latvia asked, sounding worried and confused, "How come I'm not allowed to tell Lithuania I'm visiting you?"

"Because," Estonia said, "He might not let you come. And then I'd be all alone, and that would be sad. You don't want me to be sad, do you, Latvia?"

"N-no…" Latvia whispered, "I don't want you to be sad, Estonia. I…I'll come back tonight, after Lithuania's asleep."

"Promise?" Estonia asked.

"I…"

Latvia hesitated for a moment.

"I promise."

* * *

><p><strong>Told you Latvia would do something! And now he has. ;) Don't worry, this isn't the only chapter with him in it. He'll have a pretty big role in this story from now on. <strong>

**Reviews help me remember to update on time for once! ;) (Although... EEEKKK! It's freaking Christmas... Maybe I won't update on time after all... Anyways. See you guys next chapter! **


	10. Chapter 10

**Merry Christmas (a day late)! I hope you guys all had a good day yesterday (or, if you celebrate a different holiday, I hope that went well)! **

**Guest: Thanks for your review! :D Yup, Latvia FINALLY did something! (He really is adorable.)**

**I know... As a fairly lonely person when I'm offline, I feel bad about this... Come on, Estonia... Notice how much the others care...**

**I'm glad you liked the chapter! :D And Merry Christmas to you too! **

* * *

><p>Chapter Ten:<p>

Almost before the door of Estonia's room had swung shut behind him, Latvia bolted down the hall to his own room. Once there, he slammed the door behind him and leaned against it, panting. His breathing was too fast, and his constant shaking had increased to a degree that usually only occurred around Russia…

_"T-that was scary…" _Latvia thought, _"There's something r-really wrong with Estonia…"_

It wasn't like Estonia to act like this. For as long as Latvia had known him, the other Baltic had been reserved, cold, and distant. Yes, there were times when he would express his inward frustration with Russia in an angry manner, but… He hadn't seemed _angry _this time, not exactly. No, he hadn't been angry… Or, at least, he hadn't been angry with Latvia. So what had that emotion been?

_"He was scared," _Latvia realized, _"He was scared of being alone. But that's really…really weird."_

As far as Latvia was concerned, Estonia wasn't the one who should be afraid of being alone. Estonia hadn't been by himself in an attic for over two weeks. Latvia had, and it had been an experience that left him afraid of going to sleep at night, fearful that he would wake up and find himself all alone again.

_"Why is he scared of being alone?" _Latvia thought, _"Why is he scared at all? He didn't seem scared when he r-rescued me from Mr. Russia… Or the other time, when he _didn't_ rescue me, but he tried. Why is Estonia so scared?"_

Estonia's newfound fears confused Latvia, and also scared him. The tiny boy didn't understand his friend's actions, but he was intimidated by them. The way Estonia had grabbed his arm, the desperation in his tone… It was as if the other nation felt that the whole world would end unless Latvia came back.

Latvia had never felt that needed before, and for a little while, it was a nice feeling. But then, when he started to think about it, it didn't make sense. Why would Estonia need him? Estonia was determined, outspoken, brave… Why would he need a shivering, stuttering person like Latvia?

"T-there's something wrong with him," Latvia whispered aloud, "It's scary… It's really scary. I don't want to go back there. I should tell Lithuania…"

But then he remembered. He had promised Estonia that he wouldn't tell, and he had promised to come back. And, somewhere in the past, someone had told Latvia to always keep his promises.

* * *

><p>Estonia was having doubts. He didn't know whether Latvia would actually come back or not, and being left alone scared him so much…<p>

_"Why would he come back?" _the blonde Baltic thought, _"He doesn't care. You know he doesn't."_

But then, there was a stubborn part of him that argued that Latvia did care. And that part wouldn't shut up any more than the part that denied Latvia's friendship.

Estonia's head hurt. He missed the time when the voices in his head would _agree_ on what he was supposed to do. All this arguing was hurting his head.

When the door squeaked open, he looked up quickly, expecting-or, at least, hoping-to see Latvia there.

But the only person there was Lithuania, carrying a tray.

"I brought you some food," the elder Baltic said quietly. He sounded tired.

Estonia decided that Lithuania didn't deserve a thank you, and looked away. He heard a tired sigh from Lithuania, and then a slight noise as Lithuania set the tray down.

"I'll bring you enough for breakfast and lunch tomorrow," Lithuania said, "Just in case I can't get away before evening."

There was a long silence, and Estonia thought that the other Baltic must have gone away. But when he looked up, Lithuania was standing in the doorway. And he was crying.

* * *

><p>Lithuania had hoped that Estonia would recover, that once his friend had some time to think, he would be okay. But now Estonia wouldn't even look at him.<p>

"I'm sorry," he whispered as he left Estonia's room, "I'm so sorry."

He knew Estonia didn't believe him, but he hoped that maybe, if he just said it enough, then it might get through.

_"Did anything you ever said to Russia help?" _

He tried to banish the thought from his mind, not wanting to think about how much Estonia was reminding him of Russia.

_"Estonia is not Russia. He'll get better. He…he has to get better…"_

He wasn't sure that Estonia would ever be okay again. He wasn't sure that any of them would be the same. He knew he wouldn't. After the things that had happened in these two days, he could never go back to the way things were before.

But what he was most afraid of was Belarus not returning to normal. He had never seen her in so much pain before, and it had scared him, and angered him. Ordinarily, he could stop himself from being angry with Russia. It wasn't hard to stop hating him, once you realized just how sad his life had been.

But when Russia had hurt Belarus, then Lithuania was angry. He could almost rationalize Russia's ill-treatment of the Baltics. Humans often treated their servants badly, so why should it be any different for a nation? That didn't make it right, but it was at least a little bit more rational. But when Russia had hurt Belarus, then he had crossed the line. Lithuania couldn't imagine how Russia could possibly be so unstable that he could beat his own sister and not realize how wrong it was. It wasn't the first time he had been angered by Russia's mistreatment of various nations. But with Belarus…there had been some sort of line crossed, and seeing her hurt by Russia made him angry.

_"How could anyone do that to his own sister?"_

He didn't know the answer to that question. But he did know that seeing Belarus hurt made him angry…and sad. He wanted to protect them all, and he had for so long. But now…now, it did no good to try and shield his friends from harm. They only seemed to go rushing into it even faster than they had before.

All Lithuania had left to do was try and protect Latvia. It seemed that Belarus and Estonia would never listen to him, let alone let him protect them. And his attempts to protect Estonia, where had those gotten him in the end? Estonia hated him now, and Belarus would undoubtedly come to hate him again, once she realized that he was the cause of all her suffering.

And he was afraid. Because although he acted brave to reassure Latvia, did things that Belarus seemed to consider brave, he only did those things because they were right…not because he actually had the strength to withstand all the pain alone.

* * *

><p>Belarus was seriously considering going to ask Lithuania for advice. She couldn't seem to find any way to stop her injuries from hurting, and the pain was keeping her awake.<p>

_"Lithuania didn't just seem tired…" _she thought, _"He probably _is_ exhausted. With all he has to do in the daytime… What if he can't sleep either because he's hurting so much?"_

She told herself that there was no reason to worry, that Lithuania was more than capable of taking care of himself, as he had in the past. But she had seen both sides of him now, or, at least, she thought she had. And she had seen that underneath his kind, friendly, nervous exterior, there was desperation and pain and a wish to save everyone else from the pain he had to undergo. But deeper still, she thought Lithuania doubted his ability to keep them all safe. She had seen that doubt when he broke down crying, had seen the despair and pain that he never let anyone see.

Except Russia. Russia _had_ to know what he put Lithuania through… Didn't he? Belarus was no longer sure, nor was she confident that her brother's mental state would not deteriorate further.

_"Help me save Russia from himself," _Lithuania had said, and Belarus couldn't understand why he would want to save Russia, after all her brother had done to him and to the other Baltics. She herself was no longer sure that Russia deserved to be saved.

_"He's not sane," _she thought, _"He did it because he's not sane, not because he really wants to hurt you."_

She had to believe that. It was the only way she could keep herself from hating her brother for what he had done.

_"I can't believe he hurt me like that. I…I trusted him… I believed in him, and then…"_

And then Russia had turned around and basically tried to beat her to death.

_"I can't believe I never realized how unstable he is," _Belarus thought. _"He really doesn't understand what he's doing, does he?_

She didn't think he did. Russia sounded so much like a child, so sure he was doing the right thing even when he wasn't. Even when it was obvious that he wasn't.

As if her thoughts had summoned him, Belarus heard a familiar voice outside her door.

"Belarus? Little sister, may I be coming in?"

For the first time in her life, Belarus was glad that a locked door separated her and Russia.

"No, Russia, you may not come in," she said, "I don't trust you."

"Not trusting me?" Russia echoed, sounding confused, "Belarus, I am not understanding…"

"You hurt me," Belarus snapped, "You hit me on purpose. No one in their right mind would let you in."

She heard a startled gasp from the other side of her door, and wondered what Russia was thinking. She found out a moment later.

"You are with Lithuania in this argument," Russia said, a sinister edge in his voice, "It is not being of the healthiness for you to be associating with him."

"You say that about your _favorite_?" Belarus hissed.

"Da," said Russia, "He is my favorite, but he is also having much of the bad ideas at this time. He is always of the interfering, and all it gives him is much more hurt. I do not want that hurt for you, Belarus."

There was a long silence, and Belarus had to fight the urge not to start screaming at Russia.

"I am sorry for hurting you," Russia said quietly.

Belarus froze. She had not expected this.

_"He says he's sorry…"_

"I did not want to be hurting you," Russia continued, "But I am not having any other way to teach you right things. I thought you would be knowing how to behave already…"

"Stop hurting the Baltics," Belarus snapped, "Only then will I accept your apology."

"You are not to be making demands," Russia said, "Lithuania has changed you."

"Don't be ridiculous!" Belarus hissed, "I barely know him!"

"It was not looking that way," Russia said, "When I saw you together earlier this day."

"Y-you saw that?" Belarus stammered, remembering too late to pretend she had no idea what Russia was talking about.

"Da," Russia said, "I did see that. And I am thinking that you will not be seeing Lithuania any more for some time."

"Don't you _dare_ hurt him!" Belarus growled, "If you touch him, Russia, I swear…"

There was an amused chuckle from the other side of the door.

"You are so funny," Russia said, "You can't be deciding how you feel. You used to hate him, now you like him. Tomorrow, you will hate him again, when you realize he is the reason for your punishment."

For a moment, Belarus was confused. Then, she heard a clicking noise, and realized that Russia had discovered the latch on the outside of her door.

"Russia!" she shouted, "Don't!"

"You can stay in here for some time," Russia said, sounding rather cheerful. "Maybe, if you are behaving, you can have some food. Oh, and if you are not behaving, I will hurt Lithuania. He deserves to be punished anyways."

"You think you can manipulate me using him?" Belarus asked. But she knew, when Russia threatened to hurt Lithuania, that she could not go against his orders. Not if it meant Lithuania would be hurt again.

_"Don't worry," _she thought, _"I'm not hurt. Toris… Don't do anything stupid."_

* * *

><p>Estonia wasn't sure what time it was, but he did know that it must be sometime in the middle of the night. He couldn't sleep, although he wanted to. He kept thinking about how Latvia hadn't come back, would probably never come back…<p>

And then the door of his room squeaked open, and a moment later, he heard a very quiet voice whispering to him.

"Estonia? Are you awake?"

_"He…he came back…" _Estonia thought, _"I didn't believe he would…"_

"Yes," he said, sitting up, "I'm awake."

"It took me a little while to come here," Latvia said, "I was afraid Lithuania would catch me."

"I'm glad you came," Estonia said quietly, "I get lonely here."

_"Maybe he really does care…"_

* * *

><p><strong>And this has been a chapter. Um...I have nothing to say here. Except that when my family was at church the night before last, my dad mentioned Latvia, and when my sister and I told him it was an actual country, he said "Isn't it in Russia?". And then my sister had a nervous breakdown over that, and after she asked him if he knew Estonia, Lithuania, and Belarus existed, she got a history lesson on the Soviet Union. It was a very interesting evening. XD And, yeah, I'm the one who's obsessed with the Baltics, but my sister is the one who has nervous breakdowns over people thinking they're part of Russia.<strong>

**Reviews help me remember to update! ;)**


	11. Chapter 11

**Hello! I am back, and I have nothing to say here... In return for short note at the top, the bottom one will be long.**

**Guest: Thanks for your review! :D No kidding...Russia is, like, one of the most manipulative characters ever! I agree with you, Lithuania would definitely rather suffer than see Belarus having to submit to Russia for fear something would happen to him... And he will most likely blame himself for everything. He tends to do that...**

**We need to teach everyone a nice, in depth World History class, then...**

* * *

><p>Chapter Eleven:<p>

The next morning, Lithuania woke with the thought that things had to get better, because there was no possible way for anything to get worse. However, he was proven wrong the moment he walked into the dining room. Russia and Ukraine were both seated at the table, and Latvia was just coming in from the kitchen… But Belarus was absolutely nowhere to be found.

If it hadn't been for the presence of Latvia and Ukraine, Lithuania would have confronted Russia right then and there. But Latvia did not need to witness an argument that would likely turn into a much more dangerous altercation, and one of the few things Lithuania could think of that would make the situation worse was Ukraine finding out what had been going on.

So he waited. He waited all through the quiet of eating breakfast, waited in silence when Latvia asked where Belarus was, stayed quiet when Russia cut Ukraine off midsentence, and told Latvia that Belarus didn't feel well, and would be staying in her room for a while. He waited until Ukraine finally couldn't stand the tension anymore and hurried off to her room. And then, when Ukraine was gone, Lithuania finally spoke.

"Latvia," he said, "Go and clean up the front room, all right?"

"But I cleaned it yesterday…" Latvia protested, sounding scared.

"Go," Lithuania said softly, "I'll come get you when I want you."

He listened as Latvia's footsteps faded away, and then he turned to Russia.

"It wasn't her fault," he said quietly, "You know it wasn't."

"You are admitting your own fault?" Russia said, "That is most unlike you."

"She never did anything wrong," Lithuania said, "You can't punish her for the things I did. _I_ told her the truth, remember? I made that choice. It's my fault she knows, so if you're going to punish someone, punish me."

"_Litva_," Russia sighed, "It is not her knowing what has happened that is making me do this."

"It…it's not?" Lithuania asked.

_"But… I thought that he was angry because I told Belarus his secret…"_

"If it's not your secret being told that makes you angry…" he said slowly, "Then what is it?"

"You decided first to disobey me," Russia said, "And since that time, first Latvia, and now Estonia have decided that they can also disobey. I will not be having Belarus doing the same any longer."

"You think I'm influencing _her_?" Lithuania asked, surprised.

_"How in the world could I be influencing Belarus, of all people? She doesn't let anyone tell her what to do."_

"It is not that only," Russia said, "She is becoming close to you, and that is worrying."

Lithuania was completely certain that time stopped for a moment. He was completely sure he had to have heard Russia wrong.

_"B-Belarus… Becoming close to me?"_

"That's absurd," he said aloud, "She hates me."

"It was not looking that way," Russia said, "When she was letting you hold her."

"Y-you saw that?" Lithuania stuttered.

"Da," Russia said, "And I will not be letting it continue."

Lithuania said nothing, but he felt himself beginning to get angry again.

_"He can't stop me from seeing Belarus! If I want to talk to her, then I can!"_

"You knew from the start that I would not be tolerating it if you were to start associating with my sister regularly," Russia said, "And still you were doing it. _Litva_, you allowed yourself to hurt her."

"No, I didn't!" Lithuania exclaimed, leaping up and slamming both hands down on the tabletop, "You hurt her! You hurt her by lying to her, and then you tortured her! You don't deserve her love, and you'll never get it back now!"

Russia stood up.

"She will never love you, da?" he said, "Not once she realizes that you are responsible for her pain."

"No!" Lithuania exploded, "I am not the reason for anything that happened to her, and you cannot use her to manipulate me, or the other way round!"

"I am not manipulating," Russia said quietly, "Like always, I am…"

"Helping," Lithuania said bitterly, "You still think you're helping. Oh, Russia…"

He paused, and in that silent moment, he knew true despair.

"One day, you're going to wake up and realize how wrong you were," he said, "One day, you'll be all alone."

Russia was silent for a moment. Then, he spoke, his voice quiet.

"It is not making any of the difference whether I am right," he said, "I have always been alone."

"No, Russia, you weren't!" Lithuania said, "You weren't always alone! You had Belarus, and Ukraine, and…and you had me, and maybe, you could have had the other two as friends. But you're losing us. You can see it, can't you? You're still scared of being alone. You won't be alone, Russia, if you'll just listen to sense. Please… Listen…"

"No, _Litva_," Russia said, "I will never listen, because if you are right…then everything I have done is for no purpose."

* * *

><p>Despite Latvia's secret wishes that they would stop, the nightly visits to Estonia's room continued. Somehow, he just couldn't stay away. Although he had felt on edge the entire time he had been in Estonia's room, he went back the next night. Because, somehow, he felt that Estonia really did need him.<p>

But on the second night, he noticed something odd about Estonia. Anytime something got near his chest, Estonia flinched visibly and backed away.

"Estonia?" Latvia asked, "Why are you scared?"

"I'm not scared," Estonia said, "You're imagining things."

"Someone hurt you," Latvia said softly, "See?"

He picked up a butter knife from Estonia's tray and waved it in front of the other boy. Estonia looked visibly frightened this time, pulling away from Latvia.

"Don't do that!" Estonia snapped, but there was a tremor in his voice that confirmed Latvia's fears.

"What'd Russia do?" Latvia asked.

He saw Estonia's eyes narrow, and suddenly, Latvia found himself wondering if it had really been Russia that had hurt Estonia this time.

_"No, that's really silly. No one besides Russia would have hurt him. It's always Mr. Russia. I wonder what we did that made him so angry with us…"_

"Russia didn't do anything," Estonia said, "I just don't like people pointing sharp objects at me. You shiver all the time, even when there's nothing to be scared of. Why shouldn't I get my turn?"

"I…I guess there's no reason," Latvia mumbled, "But I still think someone hurt you."

_"Why won't you tell me, Estonia? I'm worried about you…"_

* * *

><p>After Latvia left, Estonia lay awake in bed, trying to sleep, but finding himself unable to.<p>

_"Latvia came back…"_ he thought, _"He came back to see me…even though he's scared of me. I can tell he's scared of me, and he doesn't even know the truth… I… He cares… But I'll lose him… If he learns the truth, then I'll lose him. And then what will I do?"_

He didn't know what he could possibly do to insure that Latvia wouldn't find out what he had done. Unless he was to kill Latvia… But that wouldn't solve anything, would it?

_"Why am I thinking like this? Killing Latvia… I could never harm him! But…but I did try to kill Lithuania…"_

Estonia suddenly realized that he was questioning his own sanity, and that scared him.

_"I'm not insane… I'm not insane… Am I?"_

* * *

><p>Estonia was not the only one unable to sleep that night. Lithuania was in a similar predicament, although his thoughts were not about Latvia, but about Belarus.<p>

_"What if Russia tells her I'm going to be hurt because of what I did? What if she does something rash and Russia hurts her again? What if…?"_

There were so many what ifs, and the only thing he could think of to do was to tell Belarus not to take action. But…maybe it would be better if he didn't interfere. Wouldn't Belarus be safer if she never saw him again?

_"No!" _Lithuania thought, _"I can't just start ignoring her. I…I have to explain. I have to see her…just one more time, and then never again."_

* * *

><p>Belarus didn't see any point in sleeping. And yet, there was nothing else to do. It was late now; the girl judged it to be around one in the morning… But she was still awake, looking out at the moon. It was barely visible, just a tiny sliver.<p>

_"When the moon goes…" _she thought, _"Then I will sleep at night. But if I'm going to be locked in here, I may as well stay awake when the moon is up. There's something about night that is better than day… And more terrifying as well."_

It didn't make sense for her to be afraid of the night, but there was something sinister about it. The darkness hid things that ought to remain common knowledge.

_"This house has been shrouded in darkness for far too long."_

And then the knocking started. It was quiet at first, then slightly louder.

"Who's there?" she asked, trying to keep her voice icy.

The answer both surprised her and scared her.

"It's Lithuania. I need to talk to you."

_"What is he doing here?" _Belarus thought, feeling a heightened sense of apprehension, _"If Russia finds him…"_

"Go away," she said, "I don't need your help."

"I know," Lithuania said, "And I don't need yours. But I…I need to protect us both."

"You have a complex," Belarus informed him, "I don't know what kind of complex, but you most definitely have one."

"No," Lithuania said, "According to someone, I forgot whom… I have a compulsive need to save people. You once called it bravery."

"I still call it bravery," Belarus said quietly, "But I'm starting to suspect that you have a death wish."

"I don't have a death wish," Lithuania said, "And I'm not brave, either. I just… I have to save everyone else from the pain I've gone through."

"If you try so hard to save everyone from getting hurt, then why are you here?" Belarus asked.

_"He does realize that he is making absolutely no sense, doesn't he?"_

"I… I don't know," Lithuania admitted, "I just… I needed to… I needed to see you again."

Belarus sighed.

"Well, if you're going to stand out there talking to me," she said, "You might as well come in, so I can see you while I'm talking to you."

She unlocked the door, and Lithuania stepped inside. Quickly, Belarus closed and locked the door behind her. Then, she turned to Lithuania.

They stood there in silence for a moment, staring at each other, and Belarus had a fleeting thought that someone really needed to find Lithuania a shirt that fit, because he looked like a ghost in Russia's clothes.

Then, suddenly, unexpectedly, Lithuania hugged her.

Belarus froze. This was nothing like what had happened the other times. The first time Lithuania had randomly hugged her, he had been absolutely distraught, and she doubted he had known what he was doing. The second time…the second time she had been in so much pain that his embrace was comforting.

But somehow, Lithuania was comforting even now, even when she was not in pain.

So she hugged him back, cautiously. But it was hard to be cautious around Lithuania, who she knew was the one person who would not hurt her, and soon, the cautiousness was gone, and she was really embracing him.

"I was scared for you," Lithuania murmured.

"Russia won't hurt me," Belarus said, "Not here, where Ukraine could hear if I called for help."

"I would not be so much of the sureness if I were you."

Belarus felt Lithuania tense.

_"Russia! What is he doing here again?"_

Slowly, unwillingly, she turned toward the doorway. Russia stood there, watching them. He appeared unarmed, but Belarus had come to mistrust the very sight of her brother, and she was completely certain that there was some weapon hidden somewhere on his person.

"Why shouldn't I be sure?" Belarus asked, "You've lost me, Russia. You don't want to lose Ukraine too, do you?"

"I know what's happening, Belarus."

Ukraine's voice, quiet and tearful, startled them all. The older girl was standing in the hallway behind Russia.

"Let him do what he wants," Ukraine whispered, "It's better that way, it's safer."

"Safer for us!" Belarus shot back, "Not for the Baltics!"

She turned to Lithuania, who was kept glancing from her to Russia, and back again.

"Russia didn't know I knew what was going on, but I do," Ukraine said, "Belarus, just let him do what he wants. They're just servants, what harm could it…?"

"You're afraid of him!" Belarus spat, "You're afraid of him, so you're saying things you know aren't true! The Baltics are not 'just servants'! They are people, they are nations, they are just like us, and I will not stand for this behavior from two people who are supposed to be adults!"

Ukraine said nothing, merely glanced nervously at Russia, then back at Belarus.

"Would it change anything…?" Belarus said quietly, "If I told you he hurt me, too?"

Ukraine's face turned almost completely white.

"He wouldn't…" she whimpered, "Russia, you wouldn't!"

"Of course I wouldn't," Russia said soothingly, "You believe me, right, Ukraine?"

His voice was so deceptively innocent, so childish, that Belarus would have believed it herself, were it not for the bruises that still lingered on her body.

Ukraine glanced desperately between Russia and Belarus.

"I…I don't…" the older girl stammered.

"Russia is _not_ in his right mind," Belarus said, "You have to realize that."

There was dead silence in the room, and in that moment of silence, Belarus felt a hand slip into hers.

She glanced back at Lithuania, and was somehow reassured by the fact that he didn't seem afraid.

"Since you are not seeming able to speak, Ukraine," Russia said, "You could be showing me who you believe."

_"This is not good,"_ Belarus thought, and she was right. Russia reached into his coat and pulled out a gun, which he held out toward Ukraine.

"If you believe Belarus, then you can shoot me," Russia said, "If you believe me…then you can shoot Lithuania."

"Russia, I can't do that!" Ukraine wailed, "What kind of a choice is that?"

"An easy one," Russia said, "I know you trust me, sister. Everything will be okay."

"I don't want to!" Ukraine sobbed, "It's not…"

"You won't make her do it," Belarus said, "You won't do that to her."

"And who will be stopping me?" Russia asked.

"I will," Belarus said.

"Oh…" said Russia, "I had forgotten. I suppose we had better put you somewhere where you cannot be interfering."

Before Belarus could take action, Russia had grabbed her arm, pulling her away from Lithuania.

"Leave her alone!" the Baltic nation cried. Lithuania pulled on Russia's scarf, probably trying to stop the larger nation, and succeeded in getting kicked across the room.

Belarus struggled, attempting to break free from Russia's grip, but to no avail. The last thing she saw before she was shoved into the closet was Lithuania struggling to get to his feet, wincing.

"Let me out, Russia!" she yelled, kicking at the closet door, "You can't do this! Let me out!"

She couldn't see anything, but she could hear. And she heard everything.

* * *

><p>Lithuania was terrified. As far as he was concerned, no matter which story Ukraine believed, there was no question who would be shot.<p>

_"At least Belarus can't get hurt if she's locked in the closet…" _he thought. He could hear the girl screaming for Russia to let her out, but for once, he was glad Russia wasn't listening.

Ukraine was staring at him, still holding the gun, her hands shaking.

"Why are you so much of the hesitating?" Russia asked, blinking at his sister.

"I…I can't…" Ukraine sobbed, "Please don't make me do this…"

"It's not hard," Russia said, "Who do you believe? Me or Belarus?"

"Y-you…" Ukraine whimpered, "I believe you."

"Ukraine!" Belarus shouted from the closet, "You don't have to shoot anyone! Put the gun down! Are you listening? Ukraine! Please listen!"

"It's very easy," Russia said. He moved so that he was standing almost directly behind Ukraine, and then, making a few adjustments to the gun, smiled.

"All you have to do now is just aim the gun…" Russia said calmly, "And then you pull the trigger."

Lithuania forced himself to make eye contact with Ukraine. The girl looked terrified, and she was crying.

"It's all right," he said quietly, "You won't do any harm."

"I'm sorry…" Ukraine whimpered.

Lithuania smiled at her.

"I'm sorry too. But at least it's not Belarus."

"Let me out!" the nation in question screamed, "Russia, you inhumane excuse for a nation, let me out!"

"Go ahead," Lithuania said, "Shoot me."

Ukraine was still staring at him, her eyes wide and filled with tears. Lithuania sighed, and then, stepped forward and grasped the front of the gun with both hands, pulling it to his chest.

"What are you _doing_?" Ukraine wailed.

"You don't want to get hurt, right?" Lithuania asked.

"Lithuania!" Belarus screeched, "Whatever you are doing, stop it at once! Ukraine! Don't shoot him!"

"I don't think I can pull the trigger from this end," Lithuania said, "Can you pull it for me?"

"That's like helping him commit suicide!" Belarus ranted from the closet, "That's not allowed! Are you listening to me? Toris Laurinaitis! Stop this at once!"

"It's not suicide if I'll wake up later," said Lithuania, "And it's not murder when I won't die. It's okay, Ukraine. It's just a game that Russia likes to play, and he doesn't like to play alone."

"You will be needing to shoot him now," Russia said, "Otherwise, I will pulling off this bargain with you, Ukraine, and then what will be happening, I am not knowing."

"Pull the trigger," Lithuania whispered, "Just get it over with."

"Everyone stop!" Belarus shrieked.

"I'm sorry," Ukraine whimpered, "I'm so, so sorry."

Ukraine closed her eyes and pulled the trigger. And then, she ran from the room in tears, leaving the gun to fall to the ground next to Lithuania, who was finding it terribly hard to just…keep…breathing…

* * *

><p>Belarus had been certain that it would end after the first shot was fired, that Russia would let her out. But, to her surprise, nothing happened. For a moment, the only thing that could be heard was Lithuania gasping as he struggled to breathe. Then, Russia spoke.<p>

"I am thinking you still have not learned to behave."

"Please, Russia…" Lithuania wheezed.

"Other times, I was hurting to help," Russia said, "Now, I am going to hurt you because you broke all the rules, and that makes me very much angered."

"Stop!" Belarus shrieked, "Leave him alone!"

She kicked at the closet door, willing it to break and release her from this pointless captivity. But she could do nothing to break free, and although she knew this, she still fought, because how could she sit idly by and listen to Lithuania being tortured?

Then the gun went off again, and Lithuania screamed.

"Russia! Stop!" Belarus yelled, "Stop hurting him!"

Her throat was starting to hurt from all the screaming, her breathing had accelerated. And Russia kept on firing that gun.

"Please, Russia!" Lithuania screamed, "Please, stop!"

It was the first time Belarus had ever heard Lithuania beg for mercy. It was also the first time she had ever heard him sound so in pain.

Finally, the screaming stopped, and the gunshots died away. Belarus heard footsteps coming toward the closet door, and she pulled away just in time to avoid falling out onto Russia.

"You are ready to be calm now?" Russia asked, but Belarus ignored him. She didn't care. She barely even heard him. All she could do was stare at Lithuania. The boy was lying on the floor, completely still, with blood staining his clothes, his hair…

"Toris…" Belarus whispered.

She heard Russia say something to her, but she couldn't tell what. It seemed as if she had lost control of her own body, and whoever was now in control of her ran forward and knelt next to Lithuania.

He was still breathing.

"Lithuania?" Belarus whispered.

His eyes opened, just a little, and then, to Belarus's surprise, Lithuania smiled.

"It's…okay…" he rasped, "Doesn't…hurt…much…"

But it did hurt him, that Belarus could see clearly. And even though she knew he would come back, seeing him there, dying…that hurt her more than she had thought possible.

"Stay away from me, Toris," she murmured, "You'll never be safe as long as you're near me. The only thing I can ever give to you is pain."

* * *

><p><strong>I swear, I did not plan this. Any of this. Actually, I planned to have Lithuania get shot...but I didn't plan to have Ukraine show up, or to have her already know what was going on...<strong>

**Speaking of Ukraine. I have not the faintest idea how to write her, so if this chapter seems completely weird beyond reason, that is why. But I can definitely see her having already known, and just not having told anyone she knew because she didn't see anything she could do to help.**

**So, most of this fic has been written out now, and the chapters will probably be a little longer from here on out...**


	12. Chapter 12

**Hey, everyone! Happy New Year! :) I am currently happy and depressed, because I finally got to see The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies... But that means there will be no more. And that is sad. Plus, characters I liked died... And, yeah, I am actually into fantasy, I just don't write anything for fantasy books or movies... XD**

**Also... Wow! There are now 37 reviews on this story! Thank you guys! :D I've met so many nice people while writing these stories... :) **

**Guest: Thanks for your review! Ooh, I have succeeded in giving people chills! Sorry. It's very late and I'm kind of...hyper? Hmm... I guess I got a bit into that scene while I was writing it. I don't usually add a lot of detail. Thanks. :) It's surprisingly hard to write some of these characters in a serious context, but I think I might be getting the hang of it. **

**I'd definitely say Belarus has been changed (I hope for the better). And I agree with that statement. I think the people who seem the most unlovable actually need love the most sometimes... **

**Hey, I analyze characters like crazy, so I'm cool with it. ;) Thanks again!**

* * *

><p>Chapter Twelve:<p>

Latvia had never been more terrified than at the moment when Russia marched into his room in the dead of night, literally pulled him out of bed, and started dragging him down the hall.

"W-what's the matter, Mr. Russia?" Latvia wailed, completely confused, "What'd I d-do?"

"You have not done anything," Russia said, "But I am needing your help."

"I-is this about Estonia?" Latvia stammered.

Russia paused for a moment, then shook his head.

"No. This is being about Lithuania."

"Oh," said Latvia, and then fell silent. There was nothing else to say.

However, when they reached Lithuania's room, Latvia found himself trying very hard not to scream. Lithuania was lying on the floor, and Latvia now knew the exact meaning of the words 'covered in blood'.

"What _happened_?" Latvia whimpered.

"It is not being any of your business," Russia said, "All that you are needing to know is that he has been shot and needs fixing. So, fix him."

"I don't know how…" Latvia mumbled, but Russia had already gone.

And then, alone in the nearly dark room with Lithuania's body, Latvia felt as if he might lose his mind.

"I can't fix him!" the tiny nation moaned, "I don't know how! Why didn't Russia ask Estonia? He always asks Estonia!"

Latvia's voice started to rise in both pitch and volume as he grew more upset.

"Why is all this happening? What happened? Why isn't Estonia allowed to come out? Why is Lithuania shot? I don't understand what we did to make Mr. Russia hate us!"

The tiny nation was kneeling on the floor now, his head bent down so that it rested on his knees, his hands clutching at his curly hair. He wasn't just shaking from fear now, but from the sobbing cries that he could not seem to control.

Then, in the silence that was broken only by his sobs, he heard a faint voice, one that seemed to be coming out of the wall.

"Latvia?" the voice said, "Latvia, are you all right?!"

"E-Estonia?" Latvia whimpered, "W-why are you in the w-wall?"

"I'm not in the wall, silly," was the exasperated-sounding reply, "My room is next to Lithuania's. What are you doing in there, anyways?"

"L-Lithuania's shot," Latvia mumbled.

"Lithuania _what_?" Estonia asked, sounding shocked.

"Shot," Latvia whimpered, "Really badly shot."

"Oh," said Estonia, "Well…can't you fix him, then?"

"I d-don't know how," Latvia said.

Estonia sighed, sounding annoyed.

"Well, then, I'll tell you how, since I'm awake anyways. Listen carefully, okay? You have to remove the bullets."

"W-what?" Latvia stammered.

"Remove the bullets," Estonia repeated.

"I c-can't d-do that!" Latvia shrieked, "I can't!"

"Do you want Lithuania to stay like that?" Estonia demanded.

"N-no…"

"Then you have to remove the bullets."

"I _can't_!" Latvia screeched, "There's too much blood!"

"You haven't even tried," Estonia informed him, "How do you know you can't do it?"

Latvia ignored him, curling up on the floor again, and trying to stop himself from bursting into tears.

"Latvia…" Estonia said, sounding calmer now, "If you can't do it, then you'll have to let me out so I can."

"L-let you out?" Latvia asked, "Won't we get in trouble?"

"Probably," Estonia said, "But you're obviously not going to be able to help Lithuania, so I'll have to."

* * *

><p>Latvia could usually handle the sight of blood, but what he obviously could not handle was people being literally covered in the stuff. Estonia wasn't thrilled with the entire thing either, but he did feel rather pleased that something had happened to Lithuania.<p>

Of course, once that thought crossed his mind, he started to feel incredibly ashamed of himself.

_"What did he really do to you to deserve this?"_

"He literally stabbed me," Estonia muttered to himself, "That's what he did."

He glanced over at Latvia, hoping the smaller nation hadn't heard. But Latvia was huddled in the corner with his hands over his ears, his eyes tightly closed, and Estonia knew there was no chance the younger boy had heard him.

"Well, I think this will do," he said as he finished bandaging Lithuania's injuries.

Latvia did not respond, and Estonia started to feel slightly frightened.

"Are you in shock?" he asked, walking over to where Latvia was sitting.

"Don't know," Latvia mumbled, "Scared. Lithuania be all right?"

"Yeah," Estonia said, "He'll wake up tomorrow morning and probably feel fine. He's a nation, after all."

"T-thank you," Latvia whispered.

"Not a problem," Estonia said, "Are you all right, though?"

"So much blood," Latvia mumbled, "Lithuania much hurt."

"He'll be fine," Estonia said, beginning to feel rather frustrated with his younger friend, "He's always fine, remember?"

"So much blood…" Latvia repeated.

Estonia sighed.

"Latvia…"

He bent down, and managed to pick Latvia up. He was fairly accustomed to having to pull Lithuania around, and so it was comparatively easy for him to carry the tiny Latvian down the hall to Estonia's own room.

Latvia leaned against him, his eyes closed. Estonia smiled slightly, but then, Latvia's eyes snapped open.

"Estonia?" Latvia asked, sounding innocent and worried, "Why do you have a bandage where your heart is?"

Estonia felt himself beginning to panic, and fought to keep the emotion from showing on his face.

_"Why didn't I take the bandage off…?"_

"No reason," he said, trying to keep his tone light, "It's just a little scratch."

He could tell from Latvia's sorrowful expression that the tiny boy did not believe him, but the last thing he wanted to do was tell his friend the truth.

"I know you're not telling the truth," Latvia whispered, "But that's okay, Estonia. You're my friend. I trust you, so it's okay."

Estonia didn't realize he was crying until he saw the teardrops on Latvia's shirt.

"Estonia?" Latvia said, "Estonia, it's okay. You don't have to tell me."

"I c-can't tell you," Estonia muttered, "I can't."

"That's okay," Latvia said. They were just outside Estonia's room now.

"If you put me down, I can…" Latvia's voice trailed off midsentence, but Estonia knew what he had been going to say.

"Yeah…" Estonia said quietly, "It would probably be a good idea for you to lock me in again."

"Are you okay?" Latvia asked, looking extremely sorrowful.

"I'm fine," Estonia said, setting the smaller boy down. "Take care of Lithuania, all right? And…it probably wouldn't be a good idea to tell him you let me out."

"I won't," Latvia said, "Good night, Estonia."

"Good night," Estonia said. Then, he walked into his room and shut the door behind him. He heard a click a moment later, and knew that Latvia had locked the door.

"He said he didn't have to know," Estonia murmured, "He…he said he trusted me."

* * *

><p>Belarus couldn't stop the tears, nor could she predict them. They seemed to come at random moments.<p>

There was blood on the floor of her bedroom. Lithuania's blood.

"They shot him," she whispered, "He died."

"He won't stay dead," said a quiet, subdued voice from behind her.

"I know that, Ukraine," Belarus snapped, "I know everything, and Russia really did beat me."

"It won't help to resist him," Ukraine mumbled, "Believe me, I tried."

"You did?" Belarus asked, turning her head slightly to look at her sister.

"It was Estonia," Ukraine said, "The day he disappeared for the first time, I heard him screaming. So I went to see what was happening."

"What happened that first time?" Belarus asked.

"I don't know," Ukraine said, "I didn't get there fast enough. He dropped a tray, I think. But I heard him say, just before Russia started really hurting him… _'Maybe I was finally smart enough to speak up against an insane tyrant!'_, he said. To Russia…of all people… He was so foolish."

Ukraine sank down onto the floor, and Belarus could only stare at her.

"Then I…I asked Russia about it…" Ukraine moaned, "He denied it, then he yelled at me. It was…"

"Terrifying," Belarus said, "Russia in a rage is absolutely terrifying."

Ukraine looked up, seeming surprised.

"I kept bringing it up whenever you weren't around, and he got angry. I…have a scar…now."

"That _bastard_!" Belarus hissed.

"I didn't want to shoot Lithuania," Ukraine said, "But if I hadn't…"

"He would have hurt all of us," Belarus whispered.

"I'm sorry," Ukraine whimpered, "I didn't want to…"

"Now you're acting like Toris," Belarus said.

"Toris?" Ukraine asked, looking confused.

"Lithuania," Belarus corrected herself.

"I know who Toris is," Ukraine said, "You…care about him… Don't you?"

"Don't be ridiculous!" Belarus snapped. Then, she sighed. There was no point in denying it.

"I don't understand my feelings," she muttered, "He is the most impossible, annoying, ridiculous person I know… And yet…I can't stop…"

"You can't stop helping him," Ukraine said, "I…want you to stop… But you won't, will you?"

"No one can stop me from helping him," Belarus said, "Not even Russia himself."

"I'm sorry you learned the truth," Ukraine said, "You're not like me, little sister. You're too…too crazy to let Russia tell you what to do."

"Crazy?" Belarus asked. Absently, the girl pulled out her knife and watched the blade flash in the moonlight.

"I was crazy," she said, "But then a certain person showed me the truth. Now…now, I am not crazy anymore. Ukraine, do you want to know who the person is? The one who showed me the truth?"

Ukraine stared at her for a long moment, and Belarus decided that she was going to tell her sister, whether she liked it or not.

"His name is Toris."

* * *

><p><strong>And that's a chapter. It's a little shorter than the last one, as I'm not awake enough to edit the next bit at the moment... But I have the whole thing written out now, so, hopefully, I'll get the next bit up here soon. :)<strong>

**Reviews help boost Shadow's unstable confidence in herself! ;) **


	13. Chapter 13

**Hey, guys! This update is slightly late, due to some glitches on the site... If the last chapter wasn't showing up for anyone besides me and Krasavitsa, it is showing up now, so you can read it if you haven't. :) Also, AAAAAHHH! There are 41 reviews on this story! *sends everyone virtual hugs and the nation of their choice to hug* You guys are awesome!**

**Guest: Thanks you for reviewing! As for Lithuania going insane... Now, now, don't give me any ideas... NO! See what you've done? Now I will have potential sequel ideas haunting me... Oh, well, you all know I'm far too obsessed with the Baltics not to write about them. xD **

**Latvia's actually doing things these days... It's amazing. I think he's definitely witnessed a lot more suffering than he lets on... And he's definitely traumatized, even if he doesn't always show it. **

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><p>Chapter Thirteen:<p>

When Lithuania woke up, the sun was going down outside his window, and he couldn't remember what had happened to him. It wasn't until he looked down and saw the bandages covering his body that he remembered.

_"Russia forced Ukraine to shoot me. Then…then she ran away…and he kept shooting…"_

He winced, remembering the agonizing pain, remembering the blood staining his shirt, remembering the screams he hadn't realized were his own…

Remembering _Belarus_.

_"Why did she have to be there?" _he thought, _"Why did she have to see that? All this is my fault for going there when I knew it was dangerous for us both. And she told me…she told me that _she_ was the one who caused me pain. It's not her, it's me and that thrice-accursed Russia, me ruining everything with my stupidity, and he with his coat doubling as a fully equipped armory."_

It took him a moment to realize that he had just effectively cursed Russia, and when he realized, he did not feel as guilty as he usually did.

And then, in the silence, he heard voices coming through the wall. Voices coming from Estonia's room.

* * *

><p>Locked in his room all day, alone, Estonia had a lot of time to think. And think he did, until his brain hurt from trying to puzzle out the things that had happened in the last few weeks.<p>

He slept a lot too; far more than he cared to admit. It didn't really matter, either, because Lithuania only came at seven a.m. and eight p.m., or sometimes a little later in the evenings, if he had extra work to do. And he hadn't come in ever since he had been delivered to his bedroom literally shot full of holes. It had only been a day, but Estonia was very, very hungry.

Estonia wondered who was doing his chores. Then again, he mostly had to do the paperwork. Maybe Russia was actually doing it himself for once. The blonde Baltic doubted it, but, considering that he was trapped in his bedroom, there wasn't a lot he could do about it.

He waited for Latvia's visit, hoping the younger Baltic would bring him some food. He slept more during the day than he actually did at night these days. With Latvia's midnight visits, it didn't make sense for him to do all his sleeping when it was actually dark.

But it was hard to get to sleep sometimes, with everything that was on his mind.

And then, once he got to sleep, there were the weird dreams. Sometimes they were nightmares, in which Lithuania stabbed him, just like he had in the real world… But in these dreams, Latvia was there too, and he did nothing to stop Lithuania from stabbing Estonia. And if he did, it always seemed that it was Latvia who ended up with a knife in his chest, instead of Estonia.

Sometimes Estonia shot Latvia, or Lithuania, or both. Mostly, though, it was Latvia who died in his dreams.

He didn't hear voices in his dreams, and he was starting to hear them less frequently when he was awake. But they were still there sometimes, taunting him, and he hated them for it. Sometimes, they would annoy him so much that he would begin screaming at them, telling them to shut up and let him live his life. Sometimes they did. Sometimes they didn't. It was bad either way, because when they did shut up, it was too quiet.

But then, when he was sure he had no more strange dreams left to dream, he dozed off, and had a new dream.

_In his dream, he saw Latvia running through the house. The small boy appeared to be looking for something. Estonia watched Latvia search, trying to figure out what the other nation was trying to find._

_He could see that Latvia was calling out for someone, but he couldn't tell who. It was very confusing, watching the little Baltic, unable to tell what he was searching for. _

_Then, Latvia ran into the kitchen, and there was Lithuania, cooking breakfast. The small nation ran up to Lithuania, looking extremely frightened. And then, suddenly, he was able to understand what Latvia was saying._

_"Lithuania!" Latvia squeaked, "You've gotta help me!"_

_"What's the matter, Latvia?" Lithuania asked. The brunet Baltic looked concerned, but not nearly as terrified as Latvia did._

_"Estonia's missing!" Latvia wailed, "I can't find him anywhere, and I'm scared something's happened to him! Please, Lithuania, help me find him!"_

_"I'm sure Estonia's fine," Lithuania said, sounding as if he didn't really care, "Run along and do your chores now, okay? You don't want to get in trouble."_

_Latvia stared at Lithuania for a moment, and then turned away, tears in his eyes._

_"Why does nobody believe me?" the small nation whispered, "Estonia could be in trouble!"_

_Estonia watched as Latvia ran through the house, calling for him, asking everyone if they had seen him. No one seemed to care, and finally, Latvia was left kneeling on the floor, crying. _

Estonia woke with a jolt, panicking.

_"I…I was dreaming…" _he thought_ "Only a dream."_

But he couldn't stop thinking about that dream. And the more he thought about it, the more he wondered what _would_ happen if he just disappeared.

_"Would they really not care if I was gone?" _Estonia thought, _"Am I that worthless to them?"_

Suddenly, he heard the door squeak open. Estonia jumped, but then realized that it was only Latvia, who looked slightly more nervous than usual.

"Estonia?" the tiny nation said, "Are you okay? You look like you have been scared."

"Would anyone care if I was gone?" Estonia asked, fixing his gaze on Latvia, who looked confused.

"Well, I would care, and…"

Estonia was on his feet almost before he realized he had moved. The blonde nation grabbed his smaller friend by the shoulders and peered into Latvia's wide, violet eyes.

"Not you!" he said, "I know you care! I meant everyone else!"

"I d-don't know, Estonia," Latvia stuttered, "I can't t-tell what they're thinking! P-please don't shake me like t-that! You're scaring me!"

Estonia hadn't even realized that he was shaking the smaller nation, but once he did, he instantly released Latvia.

"I'm sorry," he said quietly, backing away, "I'm very sorry."

"It's okay," Latvia said, "Estonia… Are you okay? I'm very worried about you."

"I'm fine," Estonia said, "I'm fine, I'm just trying to…to…"

"To what?" Latvia asked.

"Trying to see if there's any reason I'll be missed…" Estonia said.

"Missed?" Latvia said, "Are you going to die?! You can't die, that would be scary! I would miss you!"

"I'm not going to die now," Estonia said, "I just meant…when I do. Would anybody care?"

"I'd…" Latvia began, but Estonia turned to face him again, feeling extremely angry.

"I _know_ you'd care!" he shouted, "You idiot! I know you care! I'm talking about everyone else! I'm talking about the people who said they were my friends but never included me! I'm talking about the people who have never, ever even taken the chance of getting to know me, because they think Russia will hurt them if they get close to anyone who 'belongs' to him! I'm talking about the person who I thought cared about me, who I sacrificed just about everything for, and who turned around and stabbed me in the heart! _Literally_!"

"W-what…?" Latvia whispered, backing away, "Estonia… You're scaring me…"

"Oh, I am, am I?" Estonia asked, feeling the rage he had felt before his visits with Latvia beginning to return, "You should be scared! You should be afraid, but you're too naïve to understand, aren't you?!"

"Estonia!" someone gasped. The voice was quiet, but forceful. It was Lithuania. The brunet Baltic was standing in the doorway, staring at Latvia and Estonia. He looked tired and worn, but there was a resolve evident on his face that frightened Estonia slightly.

"Step away from Latvia," Lithuania commanded, "Now."

"I'm not hurting…" Estonia started, but Lithuania cut him off.

"Let Latvia go _now_, Estonia."

Startled, Estonia backed away, leaving a confused-looking Latvia standing alone.

"Latvia," Lithuania said, "Come with me."

"A-am I in trouble?" Latvia asked.

"No," Lithuania said softly, "You didn't know any better."

The eldest Baltic took Latvia's hand, and, together, they left the room. Just before the door closed, Estonia saw Latvia glance back, his expression both solemn and sorrowful.

And as the door closed, separating him from the only person who still seemed to care, Estonia burst into tears.

* * *

><p><strong>Um... Hi. I have not much to say about this. Except that Belarus has kind of disappeared from the story. I think I have an idea for a scene with her, though, so I'll write it into the next chapter. :)<strong>


	14. Chapter 14

**Hello! I'm back again! Okay, so, this is chapter fourteen, right? There will be two more chapters, and then this fic will be over. But I'm toying with the idea of eventually writing a sequel, or some spinoff one-shots, so...**

**Guest: Thanks for your review! Heehee, I suppose I was being a little bit overdramatic at that point... Thank you for reviewing! And, no kidding... Even I feel sorry for them! **

* * *

><p>Chapter Fourteen:<p>

Lithuania wasn't certain whether he was angry with Estonia, or just annoyed with Latvia. Of course, it was hard to be annoyed with someone as tiny and innocent as Latvia.

_"He didn't know any better," _Lithuania reminded himself, _"This is my fault for not explaining everything to him before. All of this, from the very beginning, was my fault. If I hadn't passed out on the stairs that day, then Estonia wouldn't have gotten hurt in the first place."_

"Lithuania?" Latvia asked, sounding worried, "Why did you leave Estonia in there by himself? He's really lonely and sad, you know."

Lithuania sighed.

"I know, Latvia," he said quietly, "I know."

"Then why did you leave him?" Latvia asked, "Why can't he come out?"

"Latvia…" Lithuania said, "You need to listen to me very closely, okay?"

"Okay," Latvia said.

"Estonia did something that could have hurt a lot of people," Lithuania said, "But it wasn't his fault. He just needs to stay in his room for a while to get better."

"But why am I not allowed to see him anymore?" Latvia asked, "I don't know what Estonia did, but it couldn't be that bad! What was it?"

"You don't need to know," Lithuania said.

"I'm not a baby!" Latvia said, "I want to know! If you don't tell me, then I'll go back there and see him as often as I want, and you can't stop me!"

Lithuania sighed.

"You…you do have a right to know," he said, "But you have to understand that even though what Estonia did was wrong, it wasn't his fault, okay?"

Latvia nodded.

"You know what insane means, right, Latvia?"

"I know what it means," Latvia whispered, looking confused, "But Estonia isn't…"

Lithuania stayed silent, not wanting to have to actually say it aloud.

"Estonia's…insane?" Latvia asked, his eyes widening, "Really?"

"It's not his fault," Lithuania repeated, "Just like it's not Russia's fault that he hurts us. They don't know any better… They don't realize…"

"What did Estonia do?" Latvia said quietly.

"He…he tried to shoot Russia," Lithuania said. He looked away then, not wanting to look at Latvia while explaining the next part.

"He thought he could help…by killing Russia…" Lithuania continued, "But that would have made things even worse, so I tried to stop him. But then…he tried to shoot me, and I… I stabbed him."

"The bandage over his heart," Latvia whispered.

"I didn't have a choice," Lithuania said, "Believe me, Latvia, if I could have avoided stabbing him, I would have."

"I know," Latvia said, looking up at Lithuania, "Did…did it hurt him very much?"

"He… I don't know," Lithuania said.

"I think maybe getting stabbed didn't hurt him," Latvia said, "It was being told he was wrong that hurt. How do we fix him?"

"Fix him?" Lithuania asked, "I…I don't… I don't know if he can be fixed."

"No!" Latvia exploded, "Estonia's going to be fine! He didn't mean to hurt anyone, right? He just couldn't help himself…"

The boy paused, his violet eyes widening.

"Like Mr. Russia…"

"Listen, Latvia," Lithuania said softly, "Estonia is scared, and he doesn't understand what's going on. Don't ever compare him to Mr. Russia, understand?"

"I understand," Latvia said, "But we can find a way to fix him, right?"

"You don't really believe me, do you?" Lithuania asked, "You don't really believe Estonia would do those things. Oh, Latvia… Believe me, I wish this had never happened, but it did."

Latvia did not reply.

* * *

><p>Estonia had fully expected to spend the rest of his life in solitude. And, so, he was completely surprised when the door of his room swung open, and Latvia entered.<p>

"You came back?" Estonia said in astonishment.

Latvia's expression remained solemn.

"Estonia?" he said, his voice so childish and innocent that Estonia nearly decided to lie to him, "Did you really try to kill Mr. Russia?"

Estonia looked down. He wasn't sure why, but when Latvia asked him that question, he felt ashamed that he had tried to do such a thing.

"Yes," he whispered, "I did."

Latvia's eyes widened, then filled with tears.

"Raivis…"

"I can't believe it…" Latvia murmured, backing away from Estonia.

"Raivis, please listen to me…"

"You tried to kill Russia and Toris!" Latvia wailed, "How could you?"

"I was trying to…"

Latvia turned and ran from the room before Estonia finished speaking.

"Raivis!" Estonia yelled. But Latvia was gone, and even if he had not run away, why would he want to return?

"I just wanted to help…" Estonia whispered.

The blonde Baltic buried his head in his hands, trying not to cry.

"I was just trying to save all of you… Why can't you see that?"

"I tried too, Eduard."

Estonia looked up, and found Lithuania standing in the doorway.

"I tried so many times to get us out of here," Lithuania said, "You don't know how many times I've tried reasoning with Russia, pleading with him, begging him to see sense… Nothing works. And a bullet in his head or heart wouldn't have worked either. You can't solve anything by hurting people. Look what being hurt did to you."

"I wanted to save you…" Estonia said, "We could have left… We could have gone far away… But no, you had to go and ruin everything! Stupid Lithuania! Why do you always have to try and save everyone?!"

Lithuania looked pained, but then, he walked over and knelt in front of Estonia. Taking the younger boy's hands in his own, he looked up at Estonia. And in his green eyes, Estonia saw more pain than he could ever had imagined the normally cheerful Lithuania was concealing.

"I do it because I cannot bear to see anyone else in the pain I have been in," he said quietly, "Even if the one in pain is Russia, I cannot stand to see it. I do it because it is the one thing I am good for. If letting Russia hurt me will spare you and Latvia and Belarus all this pain, then I will gladly be subjected to these beatings… I would even die to save you all."

The brunet Baltic paused, and then looked down.

"And yet… I failed. Russia destroyed you in my absence, and I was powerless to stop it. And…and Belarus… He hurt Belarus… And I let him… I keep on having to choose which one of you to save, and I can't…"

Lithuania was shaking, his voice broken by sobs. Estonia stared at the older Baltic, trying to process what was happening, and finding himself unable.

"I tried so hard…" Lithuania sobbed, "And it didn't do any good… He hurt you all… I'm sorry… I'm so sorry…"

"And after all he did, you still saved him," Estonia said quietly, "You really can't stand to leave anyone behind, can you?"

"I c-can't let anyone else be hurt…" Lithuania moaned, "Even him… I…I always thought that things would change, and then we could all leave… Or…or he would get better… And we would be a real family, like he wanted us to be…"

"He only wanted someone to love him…" Estonia whispered, "Like me… He's…just like me. And I wanted to kill him…"

"You didn't know any better," Lithuania said, "It's not your fault. None of this is your fault, or Russia's. It's the fault of the person who made Russia this way. And…and it's my fault for not saving you in time. I'm sorry, Eduard…"

"You did nothing wrong," Estonia said, "You could have handled things a lot better… But it wasn't your fault. I believed Russia, and now… Now it's too late."

"Too late?" Lithuania echoed.

"Latvia hates me, and so does Ukraine… And we all know Russia hated me before anyways," Estonia said, "I…ruined everything…"

"Latvia does not hate you," Lithuania said, "I promise you that. That boy isn't capable of hatred."

"You didn't see his face…" Estonia whispered, "He was absolutely appalled… You know, before he came to visit me, I was thinking… About killing all of you… And Latvia…saved me. But now he's gone, and I'm scared!"

"You don't need to be scared…" Lithuania said softly, "I'll help you…"

"Latvia made the voices go away!" Estonia said, his voice rising in panic, "I don't want those voices to come back! They argue too much! And when they agree, they make me do bad things! I'm scared! Why'd you have to tell Latvia?"

"He had to know…" Lithuania said, "Otherwise the secret would have destroyed us all. But now…now there are no secrets."

* * *

><p>Long after night had fallen on Russia's house, long after Lithuania had gone back to his room to sleep… Long after Estonia had finally cried himself to sleep, a small figure returned to the room he had left in such a hurry earlier that day.<p>

Latvia gazed down at the sleeping Estonia, wondering how his friend could possibly have tried to kill someone.

Estonia moaned in his sleep, and thrashed about slightly, then quieted again.

"It's okay," Latvia whispered, sitting down on the edge of Estonia's bed. "It's okay. You're not alone."

"L-Lati…?" Estonia murmured, half asleep.

"It's okay," Latvia whispered, stroking Estonia's hair, "I don't hate you. I can never hate you, Estonia, even if you did do something bad. I understand why you did it… Even though it was wrong, I understand. Get better, okay? Get better… I don't hate you… I never hated you… You have to get better, Estonia… Everything will be okay, if you just get better…"

* * *

><p>Russia was still awake, prowling through the dark halls. Something was nagging at him, and it prevented him from sleeping.<p>

Finally, his wanderings led him to Belarus's room. He opened the door carefully, noiselessly, and peeked inside. What he saw would have made him happy once, but now, he felt sad to see it.

Belarus and Ukraine were both curled up on Belarus's bed. Belarus had one arm wrapped around her older sister, who appeared to be having some kind of nightmare. Ukraine was whimpering in her sleep, and as Russia watched, she began to thrash around slightly.

"No, don't!" Ukraine whimpered, "It hurts…"

Belarus's sleep was slightly more peaceful, but Russia could see from her face that she was also dreaming.

"Ivan, no…" Belarus murmured, "Stop it… Stop…"

Russia stared down at his two sisters, and wondered how things could possibly have become so dark. He wondered how things had become so terrible that he had had to hurt his own sisters.

"I never meant to hurt you," he whispered, "Never… But when you are disobeying, what else can I do?"

* * *

><p><strong>Yup. That's a chapter. As I said, there will be two after that. There is also a slight chance of a sequel at some point. Possibly. If not a sequel, then definitely some connected one-shots...<strong>

**Thank you all for your amazing feedback, following, faving, reviewing, and everything! You guys keep me inspired. :) **


	15. Chapter 15

**Well, despite my sudden interest in writing strange crossovery drabbles, I've managed to get this chapter finished! :) One more to go, and this fic will be over. **

**However, I'm almost 93% sure that I will be writing a sequel... Which means that, yes, there will almost certainly be a sequel. Actually, I write these fics for a number of complicated reasons, and writing them keeps _me_ from losing it, so... Yeah. Anyways.**

**I will warn you that there's going to be a bit of blood in this chapter. Like, a descriptive bloody scene. And...sort of attempted suicide... But not exactly. It's complicated. You'll see what I means.**

**Guest: Thanks for reviewing! :) I think he has... Maybe. He keeps tricking me into thinking he's better, and then he goes right back into insanity again. xD I'm glad you liked it. :) Lithuania really is too kind for his own good... But he's so cute... Anyways. Momentary fangirl lapse there. I beg your pardon.**

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><p>Chapter Fifteen:<p>

When Estonia woke the next day, he remembered everything. Or, at least, he thought he did. But he did not remember Latvia's visit after darkness had fallen, nor did he remember his young friend's words.

_"I… I have nothing to live for," _Estonia thought, _"Why am I still here? This…this family of Russia's… Could he not be the sole personification of this massive union? Why do I have to exist? When I was protecting Latvia, then I thought… I thought I had something worth offering. But now…all I can do is make them all mad at me… So why should I exist?"_

That thought lingered with him until Lithuania came, bearing a tray of food. The brunet Baltic stayed there with him for a while, and Estonia got the feeling that Lithuania was worried about him.

"Estonia," Lithuania said, "Russia hasn't…he hasn't come up here, has he?"

"No," said Estonia, "Or if he has, I haven't seen him."

"He tried to kill me," Lithuania said quietly, "He forced Ukraine to shoot me, and then… He…he finished…"

Lithuania broke off abruptly, but Estonia already knew what he meant.

"Those bullet wounds," he said, "Ukraine didn't cause all that damage."

"No. Russia did. I'm afraid he'll hurt you…or…or Belarus… I'm afraid he'll hurt you next."

Estonia laughed bitterly.

"I don't think there's any way he can hurt me more than he has already."

"You think that," Lithuania said, "But it's not that simple. Russia…Russia knows how to hurt people in ways they won't expect. I don't…I don't want you to be unarmed up here, alone."

The brunet Baltic reached into his pocket, and pulled out a sharp, shining kitchen knife.

"I…I don't think this is a smart decision," Lithuania said slowly, "I know it's not. I know what giving you a weapon could do to you, Estonia. But I can't…I can't just leave you undefended for Russia to hurt. You made an attempt on his life, and… He won't just let you get away with that."

Lithuania glanced down at the knife, then back up at Estonia.

"You don't have to take it," he said, "If you don't…if you don't trust yourself with it…"

"It's all right, Lithuania," Estonia said quickly, "I'll take the knife. Just…put it somewhere where I don't have to look at it."

Lithuania nodded, and slid the knife under the mattress.

"Only use it if Russia tries to hurt you," he said, "It is for nothing else."

Estonia nodded, and, reassured, Lithuania soon left the room.

_"He was right," _Estonia thought, _"It was a very bad idea to leave me alone with a knife."_

He reached under the mattress and pulled out the knife. It was so fascinating, so shiny… So deadly.

Estonia stood up and walked over to the window. Looking out, he saw snow… An icy land, with an icy-hearted personification. And yet, Russia was not the only one with a cold heart in this mansion. That, Estonia saw clearly now.

_"If I could ever have thought of killing Latvia and Lithuania… Then I do not deserve to live."_

Slowly, carefully, Estonia rolled up the left sleeve of his jacket until it was just below his elbow. The undershirt sleeve followed.

He paused for a moment, staring at the knife, and then at his exposed forearm.

_"What are you thinking? This won't actually work…"_

He slashed the knife downward, slicing across his arm. Blood spurted from the wound, onto the wall and onto the windowpane.

Estonia screamed.

_"You…you idiot… What have you _done_?"_

And, he realized, he wasn't sure what he had done. But as he stood there, staring down at his bleeding arm, he realized he did know.

_"I may not be able to kill myself… But I _can_ punish myself for my mistakes."_

He brought the knife down across his arm again, cutting deeper this time. More blood splashed onto the walls, the window, the floor, and Estonia found that despite the fact that he had rolled up his sleeves to get them out of the way, his shirt was still being stained with blood.

Estonia gasped.

_"Hurts…"_

Then, staring down at his bleeding arm, Estonia let out a low giggle.

"They can't stop me," he said, "They're all afraid of me. They're all afraid!"

He giggled again, stabbing the knife into his arm once more. He was leaning on the windowsill now, and in this position, the blood spattered up onto his face.

And he realized that he really was alone. He was alone, he was torturing himself, and it was all because of what they had done to him. They had driven him to this, all of them, by shutting him out, by not letting him help…

"Are you happy now?" Estonia screamed, "Russia? Lithuania? Latvia? Are you happy now? Are you happy that you drove me to this? This is all your fault, for hurting me! You hurt me… You all hurt me… And Ukraine, you hurt me too! Don't think I didn't see you watching that day! You did nothing to help me! You and Latvia… Neither of you cared! You all ran away! You left me alone! All of you, all you ever did was hurt me! I hope you're happy now!"

The door squeaked open behind him, and Estonia felt the murderous rage returning to him. He didn't know who was there, but he was going to kill them.

"Estonia!" someone screamed. He couldn't tell who. Everything was going red…and then black…and then red…

"Stop!"

Footsteps, running toward him, someone grabbing his arm. Estonia turned and thrust the knife at the intruder, aiming for where he judged their stomach would be. But instead of hitting someone in the stomach, his knife went into someone's shoulder.

There was only one person in Russia's household small enough for Estonia to have hit their shoulder when he was aiming for the stomach.

"Latvia!" Estonia cried.

The smaller nation let out a shrill scream and tried to back away, but tripped and fell to the ground.

"Someone _help_!" Estonia shrieked, "Lithuania! Where are you?!"

He heard footsteps on the stairs, and a moment later, Lithuania burst into the room, looking completely panicked. The eldest Baltic stopped short as he entered the room, taking in the scene through wide green eyes.

"E-Estonia…" Lithuania gasped, "What have you done?"

"It's not Estonia's fault!" Latvia moaned, clutching at his shoulder, "I s-scared him!"

Lithuania knelt in front of Latvia.

"Does it hurt much? Do you feel like you're going to pass out?"

"I…I don't k-know…" Latvia whimpered.

Estonia was still standing by the window, but now, he walked over to the other two Baltics. As he stared down at Latvia and Lithuania, he found himself wondering how he had gotten there.

"How did it come to this?" he murmured. Suddenly, he felt very light-headed. His legs gave out, and he fell to his knees.

"I'm so sorry…" he whispered, "Lati… I'm so sorry…"

"Estonia?" he heard Latvia say, "Lithuania, help Estonia!"

He heard Lithuania curse, he assumed in Lithuanian, but everything was turning red and black and white, and he couldn't see anymore, and he was just so tired…

"Estonia!" he heard someone scream, "Stay awake! Why did you do this to yourself?"

But he couldn't stay awake… He was just…so…tired…

* * *

><p>It was dark, and outside of the darkness, there was pain. Estonia wanted to stay in the comfortable darkness, but it seemed to be leaving him. And so, he had no choice but to open his eyes.<p>

He was in a room that was not his own. After a few moments, he identified it as the room in which Russia usually locked them when he wished to put them in solitary confinement for a while. The confinement of the attic or basement was reserved for more severe offenses.

"I didn't know where else to put you," a soft voice said, "There was so much blood in your room… Oh, Estonia… Why did you do that to yourself?"

Estonia looked up at Lithuania, who was sitting next to him on the bed.

"I…I don't know…" he said quietly.

"If you were human," Lithuania said, "I would have thought you were trying to commit suicide. But you're smart… You knew it wouldn't work."

"I wasn't trying to escape," Estonia said suddenly, "I was trying to punish myself."

"What?" Lithuania asked, looking completely shocked.

"I was trying to punish myself for the things I did," Estonia said, "I should have known those things were wrong, and I should never have done them…"

"Oh, Estonia…" Lithuania said softly, "Don't you know that pain never fixes anything?"

There was a long silence.

"Do you want to know something?" Estonia said at last.

Lithuania hesitated for a moment. Then, he nodded.

"I've forgiven you," Estonia said, "You didn't want to hurt me, but you had to. That day… You had to do it to save the others. I think I forgave you when Latvia found out what I'd done…when you told me how hard you tried to save us all."

He paused for a moment.

"I always wanted to be like you, you know. I knew how badly Russia hurt you, but it seemed like you had a purpose, you know. You were brave, and I was just… I was a coward. I'm still a coward."

"You were never a coward," Lithuania said, "You're a fragile child, like all of us. We're all just children, really, trying to live normal lives like we've seen humans do. But we can't. We can't live normal lives, Eduard. We're nations. We have a burden that no human could ever bear. Sometimes…sometimes I can't even bear it."

"Once," Estonia said, "I told you I wasn't a child. But really…we're all just children, aren't we?"

"Yes," Lithuania said, "Children who had to grow up before their minds were ready for it. That's why Russia is insane… Or, that's part of the reason. His mind couldn't handle everything they wanted him to do. He…he and America…and some of the others… They act like children because they never had the chance to _be_ children…"

"Will we ever get to live normal lives?" Estonia asked.

Lithuania sighed.

"I don't know. I…I wish… I wish that after our nations cease to exist, we can be reincarnated just once, to live a normal, human life. But I don't know. I guess I'll never know, until I cease to be a nation."

There was another long silence, and then something occurred to Estonia.

"Lithuania… Where is Latvia?"

"He's in his room."

"I have to apologize," Estonia said, "He needs to hear how sorry I am."

"I see," said Lithuania. "Do you want me to come with you?"

Estonia shook his head.

"No. This is something I have to do alone."

"Estonia," said Lithuania, "One more thing. I know you weren't trying to hurt Latvia. You didn't know it was him, did you?"

"If I'd known," Estonia said, "I would have stabbed myself, so I wouldn't have had to see him react to all that blood. He hates blood, Lithuania. He's so scared all the time…and I've made it worse. I have to apologize. I have to let him know… That I'm sorry…"

"I understand," Lithuania said, "Good luck, Estonia."

"Thank you," Estonia said, "I…I'll need it."

* * *

><p>Latvia's shoulder hurt. In addition to that, he was completely certain that he would never be able to handle seeing any amount of blood again.<p>

_"There…there was so much blood… All over… Estonia… He did that to himself…"_

He knew Estonia hadn't meant to hurt him… But the other nation had most definitely been engaged in what looked to Latvia like a possible attempt at suicide. And that had scared Latvia more than anything he had ever seen before.

_"Estonia's always been so calm about everything… I never thought… I never thought he could go crazy like this."_

"Latvia."

The tired, quiet voice startled Latvia, but he knew immediately who it was, even before he saw Estonia in the doorway. The other nation's arm was wrapped in bandages, and he was not wearing a shirt, a fact that Latvia was fairly certain his friend was completely oblivious to.

"Can I come in?" Estonia asked.

"Y-yeah…" Latvia said, "Uh…you know you don't have a shirt on, right?"

Estonia looked down at his bare torso and turned an interesting shade of bright red.

"I… Um…"

"Estonia!"

Lithuania's intrusion saved both of the younger Baltics from what might have been an awkward scene for the unfortunate Estonia.

"You might need this," Lithuania said, handing Estonia his mostly bloodstain-free shirt.

"Thanks," Estonia said, still blushing as he pulled the shirt over his head. "What happened to my jacket?"

"I'm going to try and get the blood out of it," Lithuania said, "I'll go do that now."

Latvia and Estonia waited in silence until Lithuania's footsteps faded away. Then, Estonia spoke.

"Latvia… I…"

The blonde Baltic sighed and looked down. When he looked back up at Latvia, his eyes were filled with tears.

"I just… I wanted to apologize. I was wrong not to tell you the truth in the first place."

"It's okay," Latvia said, "It really is."

"No, it's not," Estonia said, "I…I allowed my behavior to get out of hand. I let what Russia told me affect me more than the things I knew were true."

"When I left you on the stairs, that time you tried to rescue me after Russia locked me in the attic," Latvia said, "I didn't want to. I was scared. M-Mr. Russia… He has vodka in a cabinet in his room, and he let me try some one time, when he was in a good mood. And…it was interesting… And I wanted to try some more… And one time, he left my door unlocked, so I snuck down to his room. I…was only going to try a little, but…"

He stopped talking, realizing that Estonia was staring at him.

"You got drunk," the older Baltic said, "You got drunk, and Russia caught you."

"Yeah," Latvia said, "Getting drunk was…actually…a little bit fun. What happened after was _not_ fun. The headache I got the next day made the not fun part really not fun."

"That's called a hangover," Estonia said, sighing, "You really are an idiot."

"I know," Latvia said, "But…after that… I was really scared he would hurt me again.

There was a long pause, and Latvia started to feel ashamed of himself.

"You may be an idiot," Estonia said at last, "But you saved my life."

Latvia blinked.

"Huh?" he said, looking up at Estonia, "What are you talking about?"

"Raivis…" Estonia said. Then, he paused.

"Can I sit down?"

"Uh…sure," Latvia said, scooting over to make room for Estonia on the edge of the bed.

"Thanks," Estonia said, "I'm still kind of dizzy."

"You lost a lot of blood," Latvia said, "It was really creepy."

"Sorry," Estonia said, sighing heavily, "I…I don't think I was in my right mind then."

"So… You were gonna tell me something?" Latvia asked.

"Yeah," Estonia said, "This is going to sound strange, but… There were these voices in my head, and they talked to me."

"You had people living inside your head?" Latvia asked.

"No… Not exactly," Estonia said, "I… I don't really know what they were. Demons, maybe. I don't know. But…they agreed for a while. The first few weeks. But after I tried to kill Russia… They started fighting. It made my head hurt… My head hurt so much…"

The blonde Baltic turned to Latvia, and smiled slightly.

"But then, you came to see me. And after that, the voices started to go away. They're gone now. I'm…I'm still not better… But it helps not to have the voices in my head all the time. Latvia…you saved my life. Thank you."

Latvia wasn't sure how to reply. It was all so strange, this insanity business. And so, because he could think of no other way to respond, he threw his arms around Estonia.

And, perhaps for the first time, when Estonia hugged him back, it felt genuine, not like the awkward hugs Latvia was used to receiving from his older friend. It was a comforting feeling.

* * *

><p><strong>So, uno chapter left to go, and this story will be finished. But I'm rediscovering my love for writing nonsensical drabbles, and there's always the possibility of a sequel, right? ;) <strong>


	16. Chapter 16

**Hello, everyone! I'm back, with the final chapter of "Insanity"! **

**Guest 1: Thanks for reviewing! I totally plan to do a sequel as soon as possible. More on that at the end of the chapter. **

**I'm glad you liked the chapter (minus that semi-creepy part)! **

**I'd imagine it is pretty hard to have a fear of blood, considering Latvia lives with Russia, but, like you said, maybe that's why he has it.**

**Yeah, I knew that, and I was kind of like "OK, we need angst relief, let's have random stuff"... xD I'm glad you liked it! (And, yeah, he really shouldn't drink considering his size and age...)**

**Guest 2: Thank you for your review! I'm glad you like the story! :) **

* * *

><p>Chapter Sixteen:<p>

When Estonia finally left Latvia's room, he found Lithuania waiting for him.

"How did it go?" the older nation asked.

"Latvia's fine," Estonia said, "Although… We should probably keep him away from Russia's vodka stash in future."

The look on Lithuania's face was so completely bemused that Estonia nearly laughed aloud.

"When did he ever have access to _that_?" Lithuania asked.

"When he was locked in the attic," Estonia said, "Apparently, Russia let him try some, and then he tried a little too much the next time."

"Oh, Latvia…" Lithuania said, sighing, "If it's not him, it's you."

"I'm sorry," Estonia said, "I really am."

"I know you are," Lithuania said, "But… There's one other person to whom you owe an apology."

Estonia blinked.

"Who?"

Lithuania did not answer, merely looked at him as if he ought to know. Estonia thought for a moment, then sighed.

"Did she really take me seriously about all that?"

"You weren't in your right mind," Lithuania said, "For all she knew, you really meant to do something to her. I…I have no idea what you told her you would do… But you owe Ukraine an apology."

"I…I guess I do," Estonia agreed, "So…I guess…"

"You're technically not allowed to be out of your room until Russia says otherwise," Lithuania said, "But I've already broken every other one of his rules, so come along."

"Are you sure that's all right?" Estonia asked.

"Estonia," said Lithuania, "It is time for us to stop looking over our shoulders every five seconds for fear we'll be punished. If Russia doesn't believe we're people with the ability to think for ourselves… We need to show him."

"That's awfully bold coming from you," Estonia commented, following Lithuania down the hall.

"Is it?" Lithuania said, "I…I suppose it is rather bold."

"Something changed," Estonia said, "What was it?"

"Belarus," Lithuania said, "Belarus changed everything, although I don't believe she realizes it."

"You love her," Estonia said.

Lithuania stopped, and turned to face Estonia.

"Do not say that word," he said, "Until we have left this house. Then… Maybe… Maybe then I could think about love."

"Lithuania, if I know anything at all," Estonia said, "Then I know that you can't just force yourself not to love someone."

"There are many kinds of love," said Lithuania, "The kind you were talking about is too dangerous for her, for everyone, until we are out of this wretched place."

And then, he turned and walked on, leaving Estonia to follow him.

* * *

><p>Estonia had never felt more nervous in his life. It was one thing to apologize to Latvia and Lithuania, who he spent a large part of every day with. It was another thing entirely to apologize to Ukraine. He had barely interacted with the girl, other than exchanging routine greetings.<p>

And yet…there had been a time when he had thought that he and Ukraine could be friends. She had come after a certain incident that had involved both Estonia and Lithuania being locked in the basement, apologizing for not having done something about the situation. Estonia had told her to shut up, that it wasn't her fault. And Ukraine had said that she wanted to help, but she was scared, and anyways, she didn't see how she could help. And when Estonia had told her that it was all right, she had told him that if he ever needed help, he could ask.

And he had taken advantage of that, threatening Ukraine into giving him a gun. Looking back on it now, Estonia was completely ashamed of himself.

He was glad to have Lithuania there, though. He was sure that if the other Baltic had not come with him, he would not have been able to stand this encounter.

It was Lithuania who knocked on the door.

"Miss Ukraine?" Lithuania asked, "Miss Ukraine, it's me, Lithuania. Can I talk to you for a moment?"

There was a moment of silence, and then the door was opened by Ukraine, who took one look at Lithuania and began to cry.

"I'm so sorry!" she wailed, "I didn't want to shoot you last night, but I was scared of what Russia might do, and…"

"It's all right," Lithuania said, "I told you then I didn't blame you."

Ukraine rubbed her eyes with her hand, apparently trying to erase her tears. Then, she finally noticed Estonia, who had elected to keep his mouth shut until this point.

"What's _he_ doing here?" Ukraine shrieked in panic, retreating behind the door.

"Miss Ukraine…" Lithuania said, "Estonia wants to apologize. He…he wasn't normal… That time…"

"Not normal?" Ukraine asked, peeking around the door at Estonia and Lithuania.

"Not…sane," Lithuania amended, "But he's getting better."

"Insane people don't get better!" Ukraine squeaked.

"What about Belarus?" Lithuania challenged.

There was a long silence, and then Ukraine came slowly out from behind the door.

"You have a point," she murmured, "I…I can talk to him for a little bit. But if he tries to hurt me, I _will_ scream."

"All right," Lithuania said, "I'll be right down the hall if you need me."

Estonia watched as Lithuania walked away, stopping a short way down the hall and knocking on the door he found there. Belarus's room. Then, the blonde Baltic turned to Ukraine, who was watching him nervously.

"I…I don't know how to say this," he said, sighing, "It…it was easier with Latvia and Lithuania… Because I know them better, you see. But…I think I hurt you the most. I…I'm sorry. The things I said then… I might have meant them. I don't remember. It's all mixed up inside my head. But now…now I see…how wrong I was to say those things. That was cruel of me. I'm sorry, Ukraine. I'm very sorry. Please forgive me… Yekaterina."

Estonia looked down, away from Ukraine, who was staring at him.

_"As if she could ever forgive me… After everything I did…"_

Then, suddenly, someone was hugging him. Estonia let out a quite undignified squeak of surprise.

"Ukraine!" he yelped, "What are you doing?"

"Oh, you silly Estonia!" Ukraine said, "Don't ever do that again! We were all worried about you!"

"All right, I won't," Estonia said, feeling himself starting to blush, "Um… Can you let go?"

"Oops," Ukraine said with a giggle, "Sorry."

The girl backed away slightly. Then, she smiled.

"I'm glad you're back," she said, "I thought you were going to turn into another Russia."

"If it weren't for Latvia and Lithuania…" Estonia said quietly, "I would have. They…they really do care about me, don't they?"

Ukraine nodded.

"They care a lot about you," she said, "You should have seen how hard Lithuania was trying to save you."

"Well, he cares about everyone," Estonia said, "And that includes Russia."

Ukraine sighed.

"I…I just wish everybody would be happy again," she said, "Everyone used to be so happy."

"I know," Estonia said, "I wish…I wish we could all be happy again."

"If everyone could just get along, then Russia could have the family he wants," Ukraine said, "But he just doesn't see that he's making everyone afraid of him. Even…even me."

"I'd tell you he's not worth the effort it would take to change him," Estonia said, "But if the others hadn't tried to help me… Then I'd be just like Russia now."

"I don't know how to help anything," Ukraine fretted, "This is all so complicated!"

"It's all right," said Estonia, "You'll find a way, I'm sure."

Ukraine smiled slightly. And then, Estonia smiled back.

* * *

><p>Lithuania knew exactly how much of an idiot he was, but it didn't really matter. Just before he had passed out after being shot, he had heard Belarus telling him to stay away from her. And that made him even more determined that they find a way to stop this madness.<p>

He didn't even knock this time. He had already guessed that if he did, Belarus would lock him out.

"Don't you even knock anymore?" the girl asked as he entered. She was facing away from him, staring out the window. "That's a bit rude of you, Ukraine."

"I'm sorry to disappoint you, Miss Belarus," Lithuania said quietly, "But I'm not Ukraine."

Belarus turned and stared at him, her eyes wide.

"You idiot…" she murmured, "Why would you come back here again?"

"Because Russia can't control us," Lithuania said, "We…we can work something out… A way that he won't know… It'll be safer..."

"No!" Belarus said, "I told you to stay away from me, and I meant it! Don't you understand anything? I care about you, and that… That is a problem."

"It doesn't have to be…" Lithuania started. Then, he stopped, sighing.

"I should stop being so naïve," he said, "Nothing else has ever worked out for any of us. Why should this?"

"I…never thought I would say this…" Belarus said slowly, "But we have to…we have to…"

"We do _not_ have to do anything to Russia," Lithuania said, "I know what you're thinking, Belarus. But it won't work. We have to wait… We have to hope… Hope that something will change..."

"And if nothing changes?" Belarus asked, "What then?"

"Then…" Lithuania started, but he was cut off by a scream from the hallway.

"What was that?" Lithuania asked, startled.

"Ukraine!" Belarus gasped, running past him to the door. Lithuania followed, mentally berating himself.

_"I should never have left Estonia and Ukraine alone…"_

But, to Lithuania's surprise, when he got out into the hallway, he saw that it was neither Ukraine nor Estonia who was the actual cause of the disturbance.

Russia stood in the hallway, brandishing his pipe. Ukraine was hiding behind Estonia, who looked as if he was either having a mental breakdown or spacing out.

"Estonia!" Lithuania shouted, at the same moment that Belarus grabbed his hand and tugged him down the hallway.

Russia looked up as they approached, looking mildly surprised.

"You are _still_ together?" he asked.

"You make it sound as if we're in a relationship," Belarus muttered, "Now, what is the meaning of this?"

"He wants to kill Estonia," Lithuania murmured, but no one heard him.

"That," said Russia, shaking his pipe in Estonia's direction, "Is the matter."

"He wasn't in his right mind, Russia!" Ukraine piped up. However, upon receiving a glare from Russia, she shrunk back behind Estonia.

"I am not caring where his mind was," Russia said, "He was breaking the rules, and he will be punished."

"No, he will not!" Lithuania said, shoving past the other three nations so that he was between Russia and Estonia, "You won't touch him!"

"You are having much of the defiance this morning," Russia said, "Would you be liking some more bullet holes in your body?"

"No one is going to be hurt, Russia," Lithuania said, "Not this time. This has been going on for long enough. It's time for this to stop, before we all lose our minds. You will not hurt Estonia, or me, or Belarus, or anyone else."

"Really?" Russia asked.

"Yes," Lithuania said, "I will not let this continue. You nearly drove Estonia past the point of no return, and I do not wish to see him return to that despair. This chain of events, which started when I failed to protect Estonia, must end now. I want things to go back to the way they were before, when I was the only one in pain. I can take it. The others can't."

"No…" a voice whispered from behind Lithuania, "It will not go back to that."

Lithuania felt someone's hand slip into his, and then, Belarus was beside him, glaring at Russia.

"There must be no more hurting, brother," she said, "Stop this."

"You can have the family you always wanted!" Ukraine blurted, peeking out from behind Estonia, "I know you want a family, Russia! You can have one, if you'll just stop hurting everyone!"

"Stop this," Lithuania said, "Only you can stop this. You remember, don't you, what you told me once? You once told me that when you became a strong country, then we could be friends. You _are_ a strong country now. So why can't we stop all this violence now?"

Russia was staring at him, his violet eyes wide and confused. And then, to add to everything, Latvia came running down the hallway. The tiny nation threw his arms around the startled Estonia, and turned his wide-eyed gaze on Russia.

"Don't hurt Estonia! He doesn't need to be hurt anymore!"

Lithuania nodded.

"He's right. No one needs to be hurt anymore. Please, Russia… End this madness."

"You cannot…be doing this…" Russia stammered, obviously confused, "I am the head of this house, and…"

"You are the head of the house," said Belarus, squeezing Lithuania's hand, "But when the rest of the household sees an error in its leader, they must correct that error if they can."

"You know it is the truth, brother Russia," Ukraine said, finally coming out from behind Estonia.

Russia stared at them, looking more confused and alone than Lithuania had ever seen him. He felt a stab of pity for the other nation, but he knew this had to be done.

"We are one in this," he said, "And we call for change."

Russia's eyes filled with tears, and he turned and ran off, dropping his pipe at Lithuania's feet.

There was a dead silence for a moment, and although he knew he should feel happy that their desperate measures had worked, Lithuania felt a strange sadness.

_"I wish we could have told him in some other way. Now he really is all alone."_

"D-did it work?" Estonia finally asked, sounding dazed.

"For now," Ukraine said, "Tomorrow, we'll all pay for it."

"No," Belarus said, "There will be no more torture here. We all know the truth here. We will stand together, like we did then, and we will find a way to convince Russia of the truth. Anyone who needs help must call, and the others will come."

_"And where will that leave Russia?" _Lithuania thought, _"It will leave him hopelessly alone, with everyone united against him."_

But, although he wanted to say it aloud, he knew none of the others would agree with him. And so, he smiled, as he had so often in the past. It was a smile that he knew could fool them all.

"Yes," he said, "I think we'll be fine now."

He looked around at the others. Latvia was smiling and clinging onto Estonia, who still looked dazed. Ukraine was standing slightly behind Estonia, and she was smiling too. And Belarus… Belarus was still holding his hand.

"We'll be fine now," he repeated. And, with his friends around him, and Belarus holding his hand, he almost believed it himself. They were united, they were together. And maybe in time, Russia would see how wrong he had been, and everything would be all right. Everything would really be all right.

And yet… He still couldn't help but think that someone needed to be Russia's friend, now more than ever before.

* * *

><p><strong>And that concludes "Insanity", which will most likely be followed by a sequel. Speaking of which. Most of you probably don't know this, but I have another, older account where I've been working on longer stories for a while. One of those stories (a Death Note fic, if anyone cares) is very close to being finished, and as it's the only one there I'm still actively working on, I'm going to try and finish it up in the next couple of weeks or so. Therefore, I will not be starting any new stories on this account until I get that off my task list. (My other account is Keeralie Starflight, if anyone wants to know.) <strong>

**After I finish that, I will almost definitely be writing a sequel to this fic, and I'm toying with the idea of writing another story. (Anyone who reads the Hetalia Drabbles story, you know what I'm talking about.) That will probably be in a few weeks time (or a little while longer. We'll see.)**

**So, I'll be back in a while with more stories (and there might be a drabble or something before that).**

**Now, I have to thank you all! This fic has been a total of sixteen chapters, and has a total of fifty-six reviews at this time. I'm pretty sure this has been my most successful fic overall, so I have to thank all of you! :) *sends hugs* **

**See you all soon (if school doesn't decide it hates me even more than it already has)! **


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